I’m so glad you’re here. Whether you arrived through curiosity, community, or a soft whisper from your soul, I want to thank you for visiting my website. I know life moves fast, and time is sacred, so I honor your presence and pause.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting deeply on how we move through the world when everything around us feels uncertain or unclear. And while I’m not here to sound an alarm, I am here to say that we must understand the four essential roles we  MUST play in our lives, especially during challenging times.

These roles are essential spiritual muscles that help us show up in our truth, activate our agency, and center our souls. And in moments when everything is vying for your attention—media, politics, institutions, loved ones, fears, your needs – embracing these roles will change how you lead, love, and live.

Honestly, it took me almost 50 years to define and name the roles. Not because I lacked wisdom, but because it was difficult to discern what was needed in a culture that was constantly evolving to keep certain groups hustling, conforming, and abiding by the status quo.  But through the years— almost 4 decades of serving in corporate leadership, ministry, and entrepreneurship— I’ve discovered how these 4 roles can refine, protect, and shift how you live, lead, and love.

I refer to these roles as the Gate, the Glue, the Gap, and the Guardian. Let’s explore the roles together and identify the “MUST DO” behaviors that can fortify, empower, and stabilize you amid the uncertain winds of change.

As the Gate, you must activate your gift of discernment. You must realize that not everything or everyone deserves access to your life, your heart, your attention, or your energy. You must also recognize that boundaries are not about creating walls; they are about honoring and maintaining your worth, wealth, well-being, and worthiness. As a result, you must constantly evaluate what enters your life and to what degree so you can build and blossom without feeling burdened and burnt out.

As the Glue, you must be a soul-nourishing connector and cross-cultural collaborator.  You must learn how to bring people together with purpose, clarity, and empathy. However, being the Glue does not mean you succumb to martyrdom or mindlessly build bridges. No way! It means you should build bonds, promote mutuality, and create vital networks to support positive change. And through prayer and spiritual precision, not peer pressure, you can intentionally find ways to unify and mobilize people around causes that support the common good. (Don’t forget: GLUE is sticky, which means you must FIRST stick to your values, exemplify integrity, and demonstrate empathy to ensure you can build bridges based on truth, trust, and transparency.)

As the Gap, you must get comfortable stepping into what others fear: the unknown, the broken, the different, the uncertain, the inconvenient,  the unpopular, the uncommon,  and the invisible. You must bravely identify opportunities to rewrite rules, shape language, and dismantle barriers so all can thrive. Being the GAP also means reclaiming visionary practices of prayer, tapping into your intuition, and walking by faith. Doing so will keep you connected to God and ensure that you don’t limit yourself to your current circumstances, political realities, historical narratives, or personal suffering, so that you won’t get derailed amid adversity, attacks, and avarice.

As the Guardian, your priority must be protecting what matters most – your peace, values, health, imagination, time, purpose, and dreams. This means you must get comfortable saying “NO” to guilt, grandstanding, and gaslighting, which will provide the freedom you need to move without judgment, hesitation, or self-doubt.  Since you will be required to lead and take risks, you must lavish yourself and others with grace and peace, remembering that we are all on a journey, learning and unlearning as we go. You must also dedicate time and space for new revelations, so that fresh wisdom can freely take root in your bones and find refuge in my heart. Remember, during times of transition and political polarization, it is essential to protect your health, preserve your strength,  and cultivate liberatory practices that keep you receptive to God’s voice.

Each role is vital to your overall well-being. However, you must also declare and confront what you are not.

You must  NEVER be the Gutter. You cannot absorb dysfunction or allow toxicity in your life. You can’t accept or tolerate emotional, political, historical, doctrinal, religious, or workplace debris from those who won’t do their own healing or invest in their own growth. You can’t let the worst in others define the best in you or minimize your worth. Even if you must stand alone, you can’t let historical narratives or the loudest voices in the room drown out the truth that you know and the wisdom others need.  You can’t let bullies, boredom, and burnout steal your creativity, wonder, and joy. Most of all, you can’t let your mind or space become a dumping ground for dangerous outcomes, endless revenge, or immature decision-making. Even at your worst and when circumstances look bleak, you must remember to be the treasure, but NEVER the trash.

These lessons changed me, and I believe they will change you too. So, if you’re navigating a transition, reclaiming your identity, stepping into your next season, or just trying to process the chaos in the world, I invite you to listen to the episode. Why? This episode isn’t just a podcast; it’s a permission slip to live fully, freely, and faithfully.

Tune in now on Apple Podcast → Gate. Glue. Gap. Guardian. NEVER Gutter – Key Life Lessons in less than 10 Minutes.

Listen on YouTube → Be the Gate, Not the Gutter: Key Life Lessons That I Learned In 50 Years All in 10 Minutes.

As you reflect on the roles in your life, consider the following questions to help you evaluate how you can show up more powerfully as you continue your culture-shifting, purpose-informed work.

✨ Reflection Questions: Live It, Don’t Just Learn It

Be the GATE: What do you need to protect or filter?

• What thoughts, people, or energies have I allowed into my life that I need to release or restrict?
• What boundaries have I been afraid to enforce because I feared rejection or conflict?
• How can I better guard my mind, time, and spirit from distractions and emotional drain?

Be the GLUE: How do you build connection and collaboration?

• Where in my life or leadership can I help people come together with more compassion and clarity?
• How am I modeling empathy over ego in difficult situations?
• How can I support my community, team, or family without over-functioning or losing myself?

Be the GAP: Where are you uniquely called to stand in the in-between?

• What problem, pattern, or possibility do I see that others may not?
• Where am I being asked to be the bridge, not the builder of both sides, but the bold connector between them?
• What fear must I release to step into the space where transformation can happen, and differences co-exist?

Be the GUARDIAN: What must you protect to stay whole?

• What aspects of my peace, health, or joy am I currently sacrificing—and why?
• What relationships, roles, or routines no longer honor my worth or well-being?
• How can I start guarding my purpose with the same commitment I give to protecting others?

Avoid the GUTTER: What do you need to unlearn to stop absorbing toxicity?

• Where am I participating in gossip, drama, or dysfunction under the guise of connection or loyalty?
• What parts of myself do I betray just to belong, be liked, or avoid conflict?
• How can I stop carrying what doesn’t belong to me— other people’s pain, projections, or poison?

Remember, these roles aren’t just concepts; they are roles to support your vision, well-being, and your calling. And I know that if you embody the roles, you will soar higher than you have ever soared before.

My friend, if you are interested in exploring these roles in greater detail, I invite you to join me on Saturday, July 19th, for a 90-minute live workshop, where we’ll delve deeper into the roles of the Gate, Glue, Gap, and Guardian.

Together, we’ll explore how to apply these roles courageously in your life, career, and calling, so you can lead with purpose, amplify your impact, and safeguard your well-being.

If this message resonated with you, please share this blog with someone who could use some encouragement. And please don’t forget to subscribe to the Deciding to Soar: Living Life Your Own Way podcast for more soulful strategies to help you live, lead, and love on your own terms.

Never forget: You were born for more. You were built to soar.

Thank you for taking the time to reflect and read with me. I appreciate you. (Subscribe to my newsletter)

Blessings to you!

SharRon

P.S. I want you to know that I am not ignoring what’s happening in the world. These are hard, heartbreaking, and often horrifying times. Like many of you, I’m still trying to process it all. But I remain committed to praying, protesting, donating, and sharing my time to support efforts that honor the common good. In the meantime, I’ll continue to write and share this blog, trusting that God continues to give me words that offer spiritual sustenance and wisdom in a time of collective grief, growth, and awakening.