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Tag: Attitude

Are You Watering Weeds?

Are you watering weeds and expecting flowers to bloom?

If my elders saw someone using their effort, energy, and enthusiasm in unproductive ways, they would say they were “watering weeds.”

“Watering weeds” may not be a common expression today, but it is a statement I am exploring more in my life and with my clients.

So this week, I posed the critical question to 3 coaching groups: Where are you watering weeds?

The answers the groups shared were complex, insightful, and vulnerable. So, I wanted to share some of their answers with you, hoping you can identify where you may be metaphorically watering weeds in your own life.

Which response most resonates with you?

  • Continuing to invest in a failing business or project.
  • Staying employed at a company despite not getting opportunities to grow, develop, or contribute.
  • Staying in a relationship with someone not ambitious, abusive, or toxic.
  • Staying connected to family members who drain, use, or criticize you for evolving.
  • Staying in a faith tradition that demonizes you because of who you are and who you love.
  • Dwelling on negative thoughts and emotions, such as self-criticism, failure, and regret.
  • Spending time with people who constantly complain or criticize others.
  • Investing in relationships where there is no reciprocity or mutuality.
  • Living in places that are financially draining and emotionally stagnating.
  • Undermining your fitness goals by using food to numb emotional pain.
  • Procrastinating on important tasks and spending time scrolling on social media.
  • Donating time and money to causes that violate the public’s trust.
  • Constantly choosing temporary comfort over investing in my desired goals.

The candid and revealing conversations were life-changing. And through their own reflections, transparency, and honesty, the brave folks who shared were able to recognize the barriers that kept them in ruts and harmful situations.

The good news is that we can change! You and I can make different choices that promote our fulfillment.

Instead of watering weeds, we can “water flowers.”

“Watering flowers” is a commonly used phrase representing activities that nurture the soul, uplift the heart, and aid personal growth. Metaphorically, nurturing supportive relationships is like watering flowers.

To be clear: “Watering Flowers” is not about toxic positivity or being Pollyanna. It’s about intentionally creating a fulfilling and meaningful life.

In my private podcast, I share a few thoughts about watering weeds. Click here to listen and to subscribe.  If you have time, please tell me where you are watering flowers. Also, let me know how I can support you.

I hope you have a fantastic October and spend most of your time watering flowers, not weeds.

SharRon,

The Dare To Soar Higher Strategist

Every Arrival Is Not An Accomplishment!

Are you wishing and working for something that you really want?

Tough question, right?

Frequently, we struggle, toil, and sacrifice for goals that are not really ours. We spend the best years of our lives chasing dreams that were really “imposed expectations” or a just way for us to gain approval and validation from others.

Then, one day, we wake up and realize we have arrived at our destination, but we feel empty.

We realized we were climbing up ladders leaning on the wrong buildings.

We realize that we are living our lives by societal norms, predictable paradigms, and suffocating stereotypes.

We recognize that we were attempting to fulfill our parent’s dreams, not our own.

So, what do we do?

We DARE to change.

We get ROOTED TO RISE!

We don’t have to make quick decisions or impulsive moves.

But, we gradually unravel the web that we made to release ourselves from our own confinement.

How do I know?

It was my story. I made decisions trying to make others happy, and I was miserable. I was gradually killing my own soul.

Thankfully. I made a change, and you can too. And most of all. I can help. I and other like-minded people are joining together to make changes together so we can pursue our hearts’ desires. My Pastor said it best: Every arrival is not an accomplishment, especially when you arrive at a place and position that does not satisfy or support your soul.

Hope to see you in Rooted To Rise: A Journey Back To Yourself.

Rooted To Rise is a sacred journey for folks who want to reclaim their truth and reunite with their authentic self. It’s for big-hearted people who have dreams and want to SOAR in every aspect of their life.

It’s to get rooted so you can RISE!

Don’t Be Limited By Labels!

I hate being labeled. Don’t you?

Being boxed in or imprisoned by someone’s myopic thinking challenges my sense of justice and respect.

I am like most folks: I don’t appreciate being restricted by the opinions of people who don’t know me, especially when they don’t know themselves.

But this is what I KNOW to be true: People who can’t control, contain, or cripple you will label you to neutralize you.

They will use hateful and harmful words to strip you of your humanity and divinity.

They will hinder your ability to navigate the world by perverting your motives, underestimating your strengths, and exaggerating your weaknesses.

Of course, the label will sting!

But when you realize their labeling is the only tool they have to hinder you, you will recognize their powerless ploys for what they are …..feeble attempts at manipulation, assassination, and dehumanization.

Remember, you are beyond labels.

No sticker can capture your entire essence.

You are too masterfully made, too exceptionally equipped, and too carefully crafted to fit whatever noun or adjective they select to describe you.

But YOU MUST believe that!

You must remember that your FULL identity, ability, and potential are beyond anyone’s grasp or understanding.

You must know that no one limits you!

No name can dull your brilliance!

Granny used to say, “It doesn’t matter what they call you; it only matters what you answer to.” That means YOU, and only YOU, have the power and the privilege of determining who, what, and whose you ARE!

YOU are the designer of your life. You are the architect.

That’s why it is vital to get rooted in who you are –  anchored in your identity, purpose, and hope.

Because when you are grounded in who you are, you are less likely to get derailed by the assumptions and assessments of naysayers.

And most of all, you won’t let empty critiques and mean-spirited critics distract you from pursuing your life-enriching, soul-nourishing goals.

REMEMBER: Don’t let labels limit you. Don’t let someone’s perception disrupt your commitment to wholeness, happiness, and rest. Don’t get distracted by empty opinions.

Soar beyond the labels others place on you, and watch your life expand.

Blessings

SharRon

 

Success is never about knowing more stuff; SUCCESS is about knowing more SELF

Often, people spend a lot of time learning about relationship strategies, investment plans, and career tactics, hoping to create a life that honors their deepest desires and goals. But what they don’t learn enough about is themselves.

They don’t learn what excites their souls, what ignites their hearts, or what delights their bodies.

They don’t learn how to resist peer pressure, restore self-integrity, or reset their goals.

Some people rarely do the reflective work required to figure out how to live holistically and authentically. As a result, they follow outdated scripts, somebody else’s research, or pre-packaged life plans that don’t align with their innate strengths, dreams, or lived realities.

Some people even copy what’s popular, not appreciating that they must customize everything they learn because they are a divine design. They are unique treasures full of great promise and a unique purpose.

Prayerfully, I am learning to accept and embody MORE of my truth, knowing that I may lose money, friends, and followers.

And as I learn more about myself, I am sharing and living my truth fearlessly and unapologetically. I am not hiding what I believe, especially when it comes to justice and equity. Yes, doing so is extremely risky, but living your truth and being free always comes with substantial risks and losses.

But since I know that fulfillment and peace are on the other side of truth, I take more risks, knowing that my truth will set me free and free others.

My truth will ensure that I stay well, whole, and worthy of everything God has for me.

My truth will help me walk in clarity, stand in courage, and speak with authority.

To me, honoring my truth is crucial to preserving my integrity, gifts, and talents. And most of all, honoring who I am ensures that I avoid or don’t invest in organizations or communities that don’t value my humanity or contributions.

This month, I am focusing on a few critical questions to support my clients. I am asking:

  • How well do you know YOUR needs?
  • What lights YOU up?
  • What tickles YOUR fancy?
  • What steals YOUR joy, sleep, peace, and power?
  • What values guide and galvanize YOU?
  • What would help you tell yourself and others the truth about who you are, what you want, or what you feel called to do?
  • What role is fear currently playing in your life?

The questions are complex, but life becomes less complicated when we accept the truth about ourselves. Why? The truth unlocks, reveals, and optimizes who we are; it’s the key to unlocking vital doors in our lives.

I’m excited to share more about the power of knowing YOURSELF in my high-touch communities, Rooted To Rise, and I Dare To Be Me. If you are a leader, visionary, and truth-seeker who dares to be more of yourself, join us.

Remember, success is never about knowing more stuff; success is about knowing more SELF!

Let’s Dare To SOAR HIGHER as we learn more about ourselves so we can be free. 

Blessings,

SharRon

Who Can Help Me vs How Can I Do It Alone

Lately, I have been researching a lot about procrastination, and I have learned that procrastination is a form of wisdom.

I know…hear me out.

I learned that procrastination is a by-product of having big dreams and goals but not feeling like you know HOW to pursue them.

According to research, most people would procrastinate less if asked, “WHO can help me?” not “HOW can I accomplish my goal?”

Why?

Asking “WHO” immediately helps you reach beyond your own expertise and experience.

Asking “WHO” invites information and wisdom from other sources and expands your support pool.

Asking “WHO” helps you invest time, effort, and money in the right people– people who can offer guidance to help you achieve your goals faster and with greater ease.

So, instead of asking yourself HOW you can accomplish something, ask….

  • Who can help me achieve my goals to grow my financial portfolio, get healthier, and rebuild my relationship with my partner?
  •  Who can assist me in identifying new opportunities at my job or business?
  • Who can help me restructure my life so I can rest and build deeper relationships?
  • Who can help me maximize my income and investments?
  • Who can support me in reclaiming my confidence after a challenging experience?
  • Who can help me conquer my fears of success?
  • Who can help me leave my toxic job or “right-size” my business?
  • WHO???

Remember, the WHO question helps you take faster action because it frees you from the details, reduces your worry, and quiets your fear.

So, this week, ask, “WHO can help me?” and watch your life expand.

And, of course, if you need 1-on-1 support to help you answer the WHO question, please reply to this message. I have a few open VIP days in September.

 Also, don’t forget that Rooted To Rise: A Journey Back Home To Yourself starts on September 23rd. We are fearlessly asking the WHO question in that amazing community, too.

Have a wonderful week, and please know that I am cheering for you because I know the WHO question will enrich your life.

Blessings!

Living LONG or Living WELL or Both?

Did you know there’s a difference between LIVING LONG and LIVING WELL?

I never considered the difference until one of my mentors explained what LIVING WELL was.

According to my mentor, LIVING WELL means being the best version of yourself. It’s when you are doing work that you love, making a positive impact on the world, prioritizing your health, and surrounding yourself with people who value and appreciate you.

As a “midlifer” (that’s what I am lovingly calling myself now), that perspective resonated with my soul. It made me wonder: Am I living as well as I can?

Quietly, my soul whispered, “No, but you could if you keep making honest choices.”

So, what are honest choices?

Making honest choices is about telling yourself the truth about your desires, needs, and beliefs before you take action. It’s also about honoring your gifts, owning your strengths, and responsibly managing your physical, mental, and social resources.

Even though making honest choices is the most heart-affirming thing to do, it’s not always the easiest thing to do. In fact, implementing soul-expanding, values-inspired decisions can be difficult.

Why?

Since childhood, we have been taught and celebrated for parroting what others said or for copying what others did, even when those actions contradicted our truth.

But….what if you pushed past your discomfort, guilt, and fear and told yourself the FULL TRUTH about your deepest desires and unmet needs?

What if you turned DOWN the volume of external messages and turned UP the volume on your heart’s yearnings?

What if you trusted your longings and hopes?

What if you engage in new conversations and consider fresh beliefs?

What if you walked a different path or listened to your inner wisdom?

What if you stopped “obligated” living and embraced “option” living?

What if you shaped your world instead of being squeezed by the world?

What if you believed you were more than your history, memories, and career so you could see unlimited possibilities for your life?

What if you believed you were worthy of living WELL so you could enjoy your one precious life?

We lovingly explore what it means to LIVE WELL in all my coaching programs. We embrace the question with courageous curiosity and imagine what living well would feel, sound, and taste like.

We ask each other questions and share our experiences to learn, unlearn, and relearn ways of being true to ourselves and each other.

And guess what?

Those conversations are so clarifying and nourishing. Talking about life with generous, joy-seeking, supportive people helps you consider your values and goals. And by exchanging wisdom, everyone gains new insight and tactics to design a more fulfilling, purposeful life.

So, think about your life and ask yourself, are you living well? Determine if you are doing what you feel called, created, and anointed to do. Look within your heart and determine whether your life makes you feel inspired, motivated, or obligated. Ask yourself how to be more honest to help you dream and soar again.

Here’s the good news: there is a safe place to ask yourself soul-nourishing questions and get the support you need to thrive in Rooted To Rise: A Journey Back Home To Yourself.

Rooted To Rise is a sacred gathering where people can openly discuss ideas and take healthy risks without feeling overwhelmed or judged.

And if you join, you’ll be part of a caring, purposeful circle that will celebrate and encourage you as you rethink, reclaim, and reimagine your life.

If Rooted To Rise speaks to you, click here to get on the waitlist for the last cohort in 2023.

I share more about living well in our exclusive community podcast. Click here to listen.

LIVE WELL this week. Be good to yourself. Stretch yourself, but don’t stress yourself. And remember…you don’t have to soar alone.

Blessings,

SharRon.

 

At A Crossroads & Feeling Lost?

Are you at a crossroads in your life?

I am.

If you are like most folks, being at a crossroads in life can feel unsettling. Not knowing exactly what to do, when to do it, or where to go can cause anxiety, inner turmoil, and fear. And the fear can even feel MORE overwhelming when you believe your decisions will have life-altering or career-limiting consequences.

I get it. I wrestle and dance with fear when facing huge decisions, too. We all do.

Many clients admit that being at a crossroads is an extremely frightening place for a few reasons.

  • They have unconsciously followed scripts and predictable paths to make others happy. But now, they must create a new vision, craft fresh strategies, and travel an uncharted route toward their purpose.
  • They completed college, worked, raised children, relocated, volunteered, cared for elders, and launched businesses without considering their own needs. They did everything for others and failed to do anything for themselves. Now, they must learn to prioritize their needs amid competing demands and tight schedules.
  • They choose careers for money and status without realizing the price of “success” or the impact on their souls. Now, they need to change direction, even though debt and burnout are weighing them down.
  • They followed the societal rules and abided by the status quo, only to find themselves unfulfilled or detached from their inner compass. Now, they must re-learn how to honor their inner and ancestral wisdom to move in the world with authority and peace.
  • They conformed to stereotypes and lost their identity, confidence, and self-respect. Now they must resurrect their essence, reclaim their faith, and restore their joy.

For those reasons, many find themselves between a rock and a hard place. Lost. Confused. Exhausted. Worried. Drifting.

They find themselves so disconnected from who they really are that they cannot make informed life-giving choices.

Does this sound like your experience?

If it does, you are not alone.

Everyone experiences crossroads – sometimes many crossroads – in their lives. And crossroads are challenging, especially when you have not developed an internal system or cultivated your “inner knowing” to guide you.

For example, one of my clients told me that one day something just clicked, and she realized she was unhappy and could not continue being a lawyer. She was done! Finished. She never liked law and would not work another day in a profession that made her physically sick. She was at a crossroads. Even though she was unsure how to move forward, she was committed to moving in a new direction.

Your experience may not feel as sudden as my client’s realization. Maybe you just felt a gradual aching for something more meaningful. Perhaps you experienced a progressive loss of joy in your career. Or maybe you just outgrew your current relationships or lost feelings of connection.

You can arrive at this life-changing event called a crossroads in many ways. And trust me, every way brings some discomfort and apprehension.

Since I am at a crossroads and considering significant changes in my life, I wanted to share some tips that are helping me navigate my journey.

Reflect: Sit down, relax, find a quiet space, and think. Ask yourself about your values and buried dreams. Determine how you want to feel in this new season of your life. Get honest about your goals, needs, desires, gifts, and hopes. Tell yourself the truth. Honest reflection will help you clarify your options because your deepest aspirations sometimes get buried under the busyness of life.

Talk to people you trust. Talk to your friends, family, mentors, or clergy. Hire a coach, therapist, advisor, or counselor who can offer proven wisdom and insight. Be open to paying for advice, apprenticeship, or assessments! Remember, free insight is not always the best insight.

Do your research: Read books, articles, or blogs. Travel. Explore. The more information you have, the more aligned decisions you can make.

Don’t be afraid to take risks. Take a risk. This could mean taking a giant leap of faith or taking a small step forward based on the variables of your life. Remember, risk-taking is personal, so do what feels like a stretch for you. And most of all, don’t compare your risk tolerance with others, because we are all wired differently.

Trust your gut. Do what feels right for you in your body. Don’t be swayed by opinions, social expectations, guilt, rejection, or gender norms. Go with your gut and listen to the wisdom of your soul.

My friend, being at a crossroads signifies exciting growth, life-enriching change, and beautiful opportunities. And if you take some time to reflect, research, and trust your gut, you will make decisions that feed your soul.

I shared a message on the private podcast about being at a crossroads. Click here to listen, and let me know your thoughts.

If you are at a crossroads and need support, reply to this message. I have VIP Sessions and Daring Discussions opportunities and would love to support you.

If you want to connect with other supportive and generous people at a crossroads, consider Rooted To Rise. Rooted To Rise is a close-knit, affirming community where people journey back home to their hearts and dreams. And, Rooted To Rise may be just what you need as you consider your next chapter. Click here to get on the waitlist.

I am cheering for us and excited to see what the future holds.

Have a blessed week,

SharRon

The DARE TO SOAR HIGHER Life Strategist

Are You Willing To Lead?

You are a leader!

Do you believe that?

Last week, I started a workshop stating that everyone in the room was a leader. What was puzzling was that some folks didn’t agree with my statement.

Some shared that they didn’t feel like leaders because they didn’t have decision-making power. Others talked about titles, positions, and hierarchies as if labels and organizational charts were the only factors that determine and define leadership.

The group responses were not entirely surprising, because it’s hard to see yourself as a leader when society constantly doubts, discounts, and disrespects you. It’s also hard to appreciate and activate your sovereignty when you have been systematically marginalized because of your ability, race, class, age, body, faith, gender identity, sexual orientation, or other factors considered inferior to the “mainstream”.

So you know what I did?

I stopped the pre-planned workshop and started talking about liberatory self-leadership. Together, as a loving group, we talked about America’s complex history, the burden of stereotypes, and the heaviness of discrimination.

People shared how difficult it was to speak up and to make choices in systems that squash their voices and challenge their resolve.

It was painful to hear but powerful to see how people shared their souls, trusting that there was space for their opinions and lived experiences.

During the meeting-turn-healing-gathering, I shared information about the power of agency and choice — a choice to be an example, the choice to follow your conscience, the agency to explore options, the agency to resist tradition, and the choice to have faith.

I also shared how self-leadership ensures that you don’t deny your own lived reality, dilute your dreams, or unconsciously accept oppression.

And, I encouraged the audience to research and learn history to challenge the historical lies that deny their contributions to American culture. When you know the truth about who you are and your ancestors, you can reclaim the power and pride of your heritage. And then you can stand boldly in your divinity, dignity, and humanity.

Whew! We went all the way there!

The workshop was an engaging, healing, and transformative experience. And to every person who bravely shared their heart, THANK YOU! Your willingness to be vulnerable and honest elevated everyone in the room.

So, today, I want to ask you that question. What does self-leadership mean to you?

To me, leading myself is….

  •  About being courageous enough to maintain my beliefs and values while still being open to learning, unlearning, and relearning.
  • About opposing popular opinions that contradict my values, defying cultural norms, and reimagining success while prioritizing my wholeness.
  • About pursuing my dreams, knowing that my milestones and mistakes are equally ordered to teach me on my journey.
  • About acknowledging my unique abilities and skills while recognizing that joining forces with like-minded people and building communities is wise and helpful.
  •   About honoring the ideas, ideologies, and identities of others while also honoring my own.
  •  About leaving anything and anyone that blocks my growth, denies my self-expression, and undermines my integrity.

TRUTH: Self-leadership is the key to living a life that honors your sacred call, respects your unique identity, and gives you the power to create a peaceful life. And it ensures that your choices, divinity, and humanity are not up for debate!

Reply to this message and let me know what self-leadership means to you. Also, let me know if you would like to attend a similar workshop.

My prayer for you and me is that we embrace and embody our innate leadership, so we never feel forced to be something we don’t want to be.

Have a great week!

Blessings!

SharRon

 

Life Is About A Good Pace, Not A Fast Race!

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about society’s obsession with speed. The constant barrage of messages promoting simple solutions, quick fixes, and 30-day guarantees feels overwhelming and deceiving.

Because speed is not everything and it can’t fix everything!

Having a fulfilling, hustle-free life is about establishing a healthy PACE!

So, what if we removed the expectation of “fast” and allowed people to evolve at the speed of their hearts?

What if we slowed down so people were restored and revived while they healed?

What if we altered the pace to experience more peace while on our path to greater joy?

Because honestly…. When it comes to self-reclamation and healing, speed doesn’t matter. Evolving into your new season and becoming more of who you are is not a time-based event; it’s a welcoming homecoming back to your authentic self.

Just to be clear….. pacing yourself is not the same as endless delays and fear-based procrastination.

Pacing yourself is a commitment to growth, innovation, and healing that feels good to the soul. It’s a realization and rhythm that feels nourishing, expansive, sustainable, and spiritually honest, based on your learning style.

Pacing yourself is a self-honoring promise that allows you to rediscover your greatness and embody it in affirming ways. It ensures that you experience personal revelations so you can release societal rules and recover from minimizing beliefs.

Next week, in I Dare To Be Me, we will pace ourselves as we slowly pick up pieces of ourselves that we lost along the way. Together, we will pick up hidden desires, suppressed identities, buried dreams, and forgotten aspirations. We will look back before we look forward, ensuring we heal old wounds and extract new wisdom along the way.

By taking the time to pace ourselves, we will rediscover our own potential and access our wisdom to let go of limiting beliefs that society imposes on us.

We will also take our time to release outdated paradigms, dismantle internalized oppression, and unhook ourselves from myths that have immobilized us or have us headed in the wrong direction.

We won’t sprint in I Dare To Be Me; we will pace ourselves to embody the transformations, revelations, and lessons that emerge to apply to our lives.

We will move with intention, inspiration, and care as we courageously journey back home to our whole selves.

You are invited to join this life-enriching journey. Because even if you feel like you know yourself well, there is more inner wisdom and love inside of you that will support your dreams, desires, and destiny.

In the meantime, ask yourself a few questions.

  • Can you imagine working in the same career, being in the same relationship, or volunteering at the same organization next year? Why or why not?
  • Can you see yourself living in the same city, working in the same environment, or feeling the same way in two years? Why or why not?
  • Can you see yourself hustling less and resting more in the next few months? Why or why now?
  • Can you imagine pursuing your dreams, feeling loved, or feeling more at peace today? Why or why not?

Take a few days to sit with the questions. Pace yourself.

Then, if joining I Dare To Be Me feels right for you, join me. If not, honor your pace and continue to honor your journey. And know that I will do my best to continue sharing what I am learning so you can SOAR higher and faster than you have soared before.

Blessings!

SharRon

 

 

Acts Of Courage Come From HOPE

Happy March!

This month marks the beginning of Spring, which always signals a change in seasons, longer days, fun vacations, and exciting transformations. To me, all of those changes signal new HOPE!

And with HOPE comes a call to activate courage, because hope without courage changes nothing. But when hope is partnered with courage, lives change, policies change, businesses change, relationships change, and our paradigms change.

But just a word of caution — many people will not appreciate or welcome your acts of courage.

TRUTH: People who have done nothing significant or daring in their own lives will never understand what you are trying to do. And most of all, they won’t appreciate the cost of your courage.

 NEVER!

They will never understand your struggles, losses, stresses, or loneliness.

They will never appreciate your priorities, sacrifices, or your evolution.

They will never appreciate the risks you take or the rejection you endure.

So, as you enter a new month of unlimited possibilities and fresh revelations, guard your heart while you pursue your goals and dreams.

Prioritize your truth, desires, and vision.

Don’t feel the need to explain your decisions or justify your choices.

Don’t feel the need to announce your new path, perspective, or person.

Walk boldly and bravely into a higher dimension of destiny and fulfillment, knowing you are fully equipped to create and enjoy your dream life.

Blessings!

SharRon