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Author: SharRon Jamison

Women Over 50: You Are NOT Starting Over — You Are Starting With Experience and Hard-Earned Wisdom

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog, Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on Women Over 50: You Are NOT Starting Over — You Are Starting With Experience and Hard-Earned Wisdom

We are living in a culture obsessed with youth, trends, and constant innovation.

And unfortunately, many people are quietly absorbing the message that newer is better, younger is more valuable, and experience somehow matters less than innovation and technology.

But after decades of leadership, ministry, coaching, and navigating corporate spaces, I have come to believe something very different:

Wisdom still matters.

Discernment still matters.

Emotional intelligence still matters.

The ability to lead people through uncertainty still matters.

And the ability to rebuild after disappointment still matters too.

That is why I want to remind anyone standing at the edge of a new beginning — especially women over 50, 60, and 70, as well as people navigating reinvention, healing, recovery, or transition — of one important truth:

You are not starting from scratch.
You are starting from wisdom.

You are starting from wisdom because you already carry invisible assets.

What are invisible assets?

Invisible assets are the strengths developed through living life courageously and honestly.

Resilience.
Insight.
Discernment.
Adaptability.
Leadership capacity.
Emotional intelligence.
Creativity.
And the ability to navigate uncertainty without collapsing under pressure.

These strengths are often developed quietly through surviving difficult seasons, rebuilding after disappointment, navigating uncertainty, and continuing to evolve through life’s transitions.

And yet, many people overlook those strengths because they do not always appear on resumes, performance reviews, or social media feeds.

Recently, I explored this idea more deeply on the podcast Deciding to Soar: Living Life Your Own Way, where I discussed five powerful assets many people already possess as they begin a new chapter.

🎧 Click here to listen: Women Over 50: You Are NOT Starting Over — You Are Starting From Experience and Hard-Earned Wisdom

I call them the 5 E’s:

  • Experience.
  • Expertise.
  • Enjoyment.
  • Equipping.
  • Education.

1. EXPERIENCE — What You Have Lived Through

Experience is far bigger than employment history.

Experience includes difficult conversations, seasons of rebuilding, moments of uncertainty, and every time someone had to keep moving forward while carrying grief, exhaustion, responsibility, or fear.

Experience develops perspective.

And perspective allows people to lead with greater wisdom, steadiness, empathy, and discernment.

2. EXPERTISE — What You Naturally Do Well

Many people dismiss strengths that come naturally.

People often assume:
“Everybody can do this.”

But not everybody can.

Not everyone knows how to calm a room, build trust, navigate conflict wisely, encourage people effectively, or help others feel valued and seen.

Expertise is not arrogance.
Expertise is awareness.

3. ENJOYMENT — What Brings You Alive

Many people were raised to prioritize responsibility over fulfillment and productivity over alignment.

Entire generations learned how to survive while remaining disconnected from joy.

But enjoyment matters.

Joy provides information.
What energizes us often reveals where purpose, curiosity, alignment, and gifting intersect.

People who ignore enjoyment frequently drift toward burnout, resentment, or emotional exhaustion.

4. EQUIPPING — What Life Has Prepared You For

Every difficult season develops capacity.

Every setback.
Every betrayal.
Every recovery.
Every transition.
Every moment, someone had to continue moving forward despite uncertainty.

Some experiences build resilience.
Some build discernment.
Some build courage.
Some build adaptability.
Some build emotional steadiness.

The goal is not to romanticize suffering.
The goal is to recognize capacity.

5. EDUCATION — What You Know Deeply

Education extends far beyond degrees and certifications.

Some of life’s greatest lessons emerge through caregiving, leadership, rebuilding, recovery, observation, spiritual growth, collaboration, and community.

In fact, most people have spent decades teaching, mentoring, organizing, guiding, and leading without fully acknowledging the depth of their knowledge.

So, one of the most important things people can do in midlife is stop minimizing the wisdom they have to build something new.

———————–

I will leave you with this: midlife is often the season where people have already developed exactly what they need to build the life they desire.

So before dismissing yourself, pause long enough to take inventory of the 5 E’s.

And when you do, I believe you will discover you already possess exactly what you need for your next chapter, your new season, or your fresh beginning.

Not because life was easy.
But because life has been preparing you.

And perhaps one of the greatest forms of wisdom is finally learning how to recognize the value you already carry.

 

My blessing for you this week is this:

May you honor the wisdom you earned in seasons no one applauded.
May you stop dismissing gifts that came naturally.
May you trust that what you carry still has value.
And may you continue building forward with courage, clarity, wisdom, and self-respect.

Because the best is still yet to come.

Blessings,

SharRon

🎧 Listen to the podcast and subscribe here: Deciding To Soar: Living Life Your Own Way!

📩 Join the newsletter community for deeper reflections, leadership conversations, and encouragement for navigating reinvention, healing, purpose, and becoming.

✨ And if you are looking for community, consider joining the Reclamation Circle, where brave souls gather to navigate this season of life with honesty, courage, wisdom, and support.

P.S. If this message encouraged you, share it with someone beginning a new chapter and remind them that they are not starting from scratch either.

You Are Not Done Until You Are Dead: You Are NOT TOO Old To Begin Again!

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog, Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on You Are Not Done Until You Are Dead: You Are NOT TOO Old To Begin Again!

“You’re Not Done Until You’re Dead.”

There’s something my elders used to say.

They didn’t say it to pressure me.

They said it to remind me that life is always asking something of us: to grow, to evolve, to heal, to contribute, and to honor our purpose.

Why?

Our purpose does not disappear with time.

Purpose also does not stop because we have gray hair, grandchildren, or weariness.

My elders wanted us to remember that, as long as we are on this earth, our divine purpose can always be cultivated, expressed, or reclaimed, because it never goes away.

And lately, their wisdom has continued to challenge me and shape how I live and navigate my own life.

So much so that a couple of weeks ago, I recorded a podcast and led a workshop about owning your strengths, about knowing what gifts you carry, and understanding how important it is not to shrink or abandon yourself during seasons of transition.

I was excited about both experiences. The conversations were honest, healing, and well-received. Women shared openly. People felt seen, nourished, and encouraged.

But afterward, a few women, especially women over 50, quietly shared something deeper with me.

They said things like:

“I think I’m too old to start over.”
“I don’t know if I can begin again.”
“I feel like I missed my time.”

And if I’m honest, I understood exactly what they meant.

Because there have been moments, especially in midlife, when many of us begin questioning our relevance instead of recognizing our refinement.

And as a woman in her 60s, I know this feeling with deep clarity and deep certainty.

I also know something else.

Women in their 50s, 60s, and 70s can still be seasoned, still vibrant, still sexy, and still becoming.

Not becoming who the world expects us to be.

Becoming who we feel called to be. (Link to the podcast)

More honest.
More aligned.
More courageous.
More ourselves.

But before we can fully embrace that truth, I think we have to ask ourselves an important question: Why do so many women believe that getting older means they are finished?

I believe part of the answer is cultural.

We live in a world that constantly celebrates what is new, fast, trendy, and visible. We are surrounded by messages that glorify youth while quietly dismissing depth. In that kind of environment, something subtle but powerful begins to happen.

Experience gets overlooked. Wisdom gets questioned. Depth gets minimized.

And if we are not careful, we begin to internalize those messages. We start questioning ourselves. Our relevance. Our timing. Our ability to grow, evolve, contribute, or begin again.

Sometimes, some women even stop seeing themselves as expanding and start seeing themselves as expiring.

But what I know now, both personally and professionally, is this: What you carry did not expire. It evolved.

Your gifts evolved.
Your perspective evolved.
Your understanding evolved.

Time did not erase you.

It refined you.

And this is what I know for sure about the midlife moment. ( I share more in the podcast.)

1. Technology Does Not Supersede Truth

Yes, the world is changing rapidly. Technology is evolving. Artificial intelligence is becoming integrated into nearly every aspect of our lives and work. Entire industries are transforming before our eyes.

But technology cannot replace wisdom.

It cannot replace discernment. It cannot replace emotional intelligence. It cannot replace lived experience. It cannot replace the kind of insight that only comes from surviving disappointment, rebuilding after loss, navigating uncertainty, loving deeply, leading imperfectly, and learning through time.

That matters.

Especially now.

Because while tools may evolve, human beings still need wisdom. They still need grounded people who know how to navigate complexity, relationships, transitions, grief, uncertainty, and change.

And what that means for you is simple:

You are not obsolete because the world has changed.

You may simply need to learn how to apply your wisdom in a new way.

That is very different.

2. Traditions Are Not Always the Truth

Many of us inherited beliefs about aging that were never designed to empower us.

We were taught that getting older meant slowing down, stepping aside, becoming less visible, less desirable, and less valuable.

But traditions are not always the truth.

Sometimes traditions are simply inherited limitations r cultural scripts that no one questioned long enough to challenge.

Thankfully, many women are courageously beginning to challenge them.

Because the truth is:

You can still create.
You can still lead.
You can still learn.
You can still pivot.
You can still evolve.

You are not required to sit on the sidelines of your own life simply because you have reached a certain age.

In fact, many women become more powerful with age because they stop living for approval and start living from alignment.

And what that means for you is this:

You do not have to spend the rest of your life “performing” and accepting limitations just because the culture feels more comfortable when women shrink.

You can still become a change-maker instead of a bystander in your own story.

3. Time Uncovers Truth

One of the greatest gifts of aging is clarity.

Time has a way of uncovering what truly matters. It reveals what aligns and what doesn’t. It reveals what drains us and what nourishes us. It reveals which dreams were truly ours and which ones we inherited from expectation, survival, fear, or performance.

Time also teaches us something else:

We do not just grow older.

We grow wiser.

And wisdom changes how you move through the world.

It deepens your perspective.
It strengthens your resilience.
It sharpens your discernment.
It softens your ego.
It clarifies your values.

So let me say this clearly: Growth is not based on age. Growth is based on desire.

If you still desire to grow, evolve, create, heal, learn, contribute, or begin again, then you still have the capacity to do so.

And what that means for you is this: You are not too late.

You are simply being invited to grow differently than before.

4. Truth Is Transferred

Every generation carries wisdom that another generation needs.

Younger generations have perspectives, innovation, and insights that matter deeply. They understand concepts  many of us did not have access to at their age.

And older generations also carry something equally valuable: perspective, endurance, context, resilience, emotional wisdom, and lived understanding.

When generations respect each other rather than compete, wisdom flows.

And that matters because none of us are meant to navigate life believing that one generation holds all the answers.

Real growth happens when experience and a new perspective meet with humility, creativity, and respect.

And what that means for you is this: Your age is not a disqualification.

Your lived experience is part of your contribution.

As I have reflected on all of this over the last few weeks, I keep returning to one question:

Perhaps the question is not: “Am I too late?”

Perhaps the better question is: Where can what I carry live now?

Where can your strengths be expressed more honestly?
Where can your wisdom be used more intentionally?
Where can your voice be heard more authentically?
Where can your experience create something meaningful?

Because fulfillment is not found in pretending to be younger.

Fulfillment is found in becoming more fully yourself. In becoming more honest about who you are and what you need.

The biggest blessing is to remember this: you are not starting from scratch.

You are building from experience, wisdom, resilience, insight, courage, and strength that have already been tested and refined.

So if you are in a season where things feel uncertain, unrecognizable, in-between, or unclear, I want to encourage you not to give up on yourself.

Not now. Not ever.

Not after everything you’ve survived.
Not after everything you’ve learned.
Not after everything you still carry.

You still have something to offer.

You still have something to build.

You still have something to become.

And perhaps this season is not asking you to disappear. Perhaps it is asking you to reclaim yourself in ways that honor the truth of who you are.

👉🏾 If this message resonated with you, I invite you to subscribe to my YouTube channel. Over the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing more conversations about the power of the midlife moment, the importance of reclamation, and what it means to use your strengths to create a life that honors your soul instead of abandoning it.

👉🏾 If you know a woman who needs this message, forward this article to her. She may never say she needed it, but something in you will know.

👉🏾 And if you are in a season where you are ready to stop carrying everything alone and want to explore what reclamation could look like in your own life, you can send me an email at SharRon@SharRonJamison.com with the word RECLAIMING. I would love to share more with you about the Reclaiming Circle and the deeper conversations we are creating there.

👉🏾 And while you are here, I invite you to subscribe to my newsletter as well. Click here to join. The blog allows me to share ideas, but the newsletter gives me space to have more intimate conversations about healing, leadership, reinvention, purpose, grief, growth, and becoming.

One door or all four.

Come as you are.

My Blessing for You This Week:

May you trust what you carry.
May you honor the wisdom you’ve gained with time.
May you remember that your growth is still unfolding.
May you have the courage to use your strengths fully and unapologetically.
And may you never confuse aging with ending.

Because you are not done.

You are still becoming.

Blessings,

SharRon

The Day I Stopped Pretending I Was Fine

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog, Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on The Day I Stopped Pretending I Was Fine

There is a kind of tired that has nothing to do with sleep.

My elders called it being “bone weary.” And I always thought I understood what they meant.

I did not. Not really. Not until I came home from church one Sunday, walked through the door, and something in me just… gave way.

I took off my clothes, sat down on the edge of my bed, and cried.

Silently.

The kind of tears that have been waiting for a quiet moment when no one is watching.

And when they finally slowed, I told myself the truth.

I was not okay.

Not depressed — I want to name that distinction clearly because it matters. I know what depression feels like. Depression is not a stranger to me. I have navigated its particular kind of darkness before.

This was something different.

Something quieter. Something that had been settling into my bones for months, even as I kept showing up, producing, encouraging, and performing fine.

This was spiritual depletion.  I discuss this topic in this week’s episode of Deciding To Soar: Living Life Your Own Way. Click here to listen.)

Now, I want to pause here — because when I first put those two words together, something in me resisted.

My religious upbringing made me feel guilty even placing those words side by side. As if admitting that my spirit was depleted meant I had somehow failed God. As if I should have been able to pray through it, serve through it, praise through it,  worship through it, and work through it.

But here is what I now know: Naming “spiritual depletion” was not a crisis of faith. It was a courageous act of faith.

Why?

Because spiritual depletion is not the same as burnout.

Burnout is about doing too much….for too many… for too long….without any support, joy, or purpose.

Spiritual depletion is what happens when a woman has been giving from her deepest self — her spirit, her core, her truest identity — for so long, to too many, and in so many directions, that she loses access to herself.

Of course, she is still succeeding according to how society defines success.

She is still functioning.

She is still showing up.

She is still looking good and well-dressed.

She is still leading her team, achieving milestones, and effectively executing strategies.

Yes, she is still building her business, seeing patients, advising her clients, teaching her students, and raising her children.

 But something essential is gone. And she knows it, even though she cannot name it.

It looks like:

  • Going to church out of  obligation instead of spiritual renewal
  • Work becoming mechanical — parts of you present, other parts quietly withdrawn
  • Being physically present but emotionally distant
  • Code-switching, shifting from feeling like a survival strategy into something that feels like slow self-erasure
  • A bone-deep weariness that sleep does not touch
  • Relationships with people who need you but never feed you — emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually
  • A quiet desire to stop. Not to disappear. Just to finally, finally rest, even though you can’t clearly articulate what type of rest and respite you crave or need. 

That Sunday after church, I realized I had run out of places to hide.

Not from other people.

From myself.

And so I had to do the one thing I had been avoiding.

I had to come back to myself.

As uncomfortable as that was — and it was deeply uncomfortable — it was also sacred.

Because that moment marked the beginning of one of the most honest seasons of my life.

If you are reading this and something in you just exhaled…

If something whispered, that sounds like me…

If you have been calling it burnout, or stress, or just being tired — because spiritual depletion felt too big, too tender, too much to admit…

I want you to know: what you are feeling is real.

You are not weak.

You are not ungrateful.

You are not failing.

You are not less accomplished.

You are depleted. And there is a difference.

Here is where I would invite you to begin. Just three things. I call them the 3 N’s.

Name it. Tell yourself the truth without softening it. Without comparing it. Just name where you actually are — honestly, without apology.

Notice it. Look compassionately at where your energy is actually going. Not to fix it overnight. Just to see it clearly. Clarity creates space even before anything changes.

Nourish it. Each day, allow yourself to admit one true thing. Not positive. Not polished. Just real….For example, I am tired. I miss who I used to be. I am still here, and that is enough. Those small truths begin to reconnect you to yourself in ways that performance never could.

What I know for sure: You cannot outrun your own depletion. Eventually, the depletion will sit you down. The only question is whether you sit down on your own terms, or whether life does it for you.

For me, it was a little bit of both that eventually forced me to sit down on the edge of that bed.

And it was the most sacred thing that had happened to me in years.

 I want to leave you with this….

This week, please remember — you matter.

What you are feeling matters.

What you are carrying matters.

And the most holy action you can take right now is to take care of yourself.

Not tomorrow. Not after you finish everything on your list. Not after everyone else is okay.

Now.

So name it. Notice it. Nourish it.

It is time to SOAR.

This Week’s Blessing:

May you have the courage to tell yourself the truth — even when the truth is tender.

May you honor what your spirit has been trying to say.

May you Name what you are carrying, Notice where your energy is going, and Nourish yourself back to wholeness — one true thing at a time.

And may you trust that even here, in this honest and sacred space, you are still becoming.

Blessings,

SharRon 💛

I explore this more on this week’s episode of Deciding to Soar. Listen on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and wherever you get your podcasts.

And join me for more conversations — subscribe to A True Word, my weekly letter. Join here.

I Know What I Carry: Why Owning Your Strengths Changes Everything

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There is a shift happening.

It is not loud. It is not dramatic. But it is real.

I hear it in conversations. I see it in my clients. And if I am honest, I have felt it in my own life. It shows up as a quiet unease—a growing awareness that something is no longer working the way it once did in our jobs, our families, and even in our relationships.

More and more people are recognizing the same pattern:

  • They feel underappreciated and overused
  • They are carrying more responsibility than ever, yet feel less seen and less supported
  • They are contributing at high levels, yet only parts of them are being recognized or utilized
  • They are showing up, adjusting, and accommodating, yet something still feels incomplete or unfulfilled

When you constantly feel this way, it creates a tension—a subtle but persistent reminder that you are giving more than the environment or the relationships around you can fully receive or honor. And if we are honest, it begins to chip away at your spirit. It doesn’t feel good, and it was never meant to.

None of us were meant to beg to be seen, hustle to feel heard, or sell our souls to be successful.

So if you have been feeling this way, pause.

Acknowledge it.
Do not judge it.
Do not dismiss it.

Because that awareness is not weakness; it is information. It is a signal that something within you is ready for greater alignment, greater honesty, and greater ownership.

That is why I created this conversation around “I Know What I Carry.” Click here to listen. Because understanding your strengths is not just helpful—it is transformational. It gives you six powerful forms of awareness that remind you just how capable, how extraordinary, and how equipped you truly are.

Let’s walk through them.

Accuracy: Owning your strengths is not arrogance; it is truth.

Accuracy gives you clarity. It allows you to tell the truth about what you do well without minimizing it or waiting for external validation. When you are clear, your decisions become more grounded, more intentional, and more aligned.

Alignment: Your strengths deserve the right environment.

Alignment gives you direction. It helps you stop scattering your energy across spaces that can only partially receive you and instead place your gifts where they can be fully expressed. Alignment reduces exhaustion and increases impact.

Assurance: Your strength creates internal stability.

Assurance is deeper than confidence. It is not dependent on applause or recognition. It is an internal knowing that steadies you, allowing you to stand in your value even when others do not see it immediately.

Authority: You don’t have to wait to be chosen.

Authority shifts you from waiting to deciding. It reminds you that while others may control access to platforms or positions, they do not control your purpose. You have the right to move, build, and act from what you know you carry.

Agency: Your strengths give you options.

Agency expands your choices. It allows you to decide where your gifts go, how they are used, and what you will no longer tolerate. This is where freedom begins.

Anchoring: Your strengths steady you in uncertain times.

Life will shift. Roles will change. Expectations will evolve. But when you are grounded in your strengths, you are not easily moved. You have something internal to return to—something that stabilizes you no matter what is happening around you.

When you understand and own all of this, everything changes.

You begin to see that you are not stuck.
You are not limited.
You are not required to remain in spaces that diminish you.

You can make a change.
You can make a decision.
You can create something different.

You are not here to exist in fragments. You are here to live, lead, and serve in fullness. And when you remember and activate your strengths, you begin to move differently. You begin to see possibilities where you once saw limitations.

So let me remind you clearly:

You are equipped.
You have everything you need encoded in your DNA.
You lack nothing.
You have what it takes to make the changes in your life that keep you sane, safe, successful, and satisfied.

This Week’s Blessing:

May you stop negotiating what God already named.
May you stand in what you carry without apology.
May you trust your strength—not as arrogance, but as alignment.
May you move with assurance when the world is uncertain.
May you sit in authority without waiting to be chosen.
And may you build a life that reflects not just what you can do… but who you were called to be.

Because you don’t need more permission.

You need more clarity.

And clarity begins the moment you say—

I know what I carry.

I shared more about this in this week’s podcast episode, and I hope it meets you wherever you are. I invite you to listen to the episode here on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and other platforms.

Also, be sure to join my newsletter for more conversations. Join here.

Blessings!

SharRon

Don’t Fall in Love with the “Water” and Forget to Care for the “Well”

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My elders used to say, “Don’t fall so much in love with the ‘water’ that you forget to care for the ‘well’”.

For a long time, I understood that as a simple reminder to be grateful. To say thank you. To not take things for granted. But as I have grown—through my relationships, my responsibilities, and my own seasons of needing and being needed—I have come to understand that this wisdom is asking something much deeper of us.

It is not just asking us to receive with gratitude. It is asking us to live with awareness.

Because the “water” in our lives—the support, the encouragement, the insight, the presence we rely on—does not exist on its own. It comes from somewhere. More precisely, it comes from someone.

The “water” is what we receive. It is the friend who listens when we are overwhelmed, the person who shows up when we do not have the words, the one who offers guidance when we feel uncertain. It is the opportunity that finds us at the right time, the resource that meets a need, the financial support, the introduction, the advice that shifts our thinking. The “water” sustains us, and we all need it.

But the “well” is who made it possible.

The “well” is the person who chose to give. The one who made space, who offered time, who extended care, who poured from their own experience so that we might benefit. The “well” is not automatic. It is intentional. People decide—consciously or unconsciously—to be “wells” in our lives.

And yet, we live in a culture that teaches us to focus almost exclusively on the “water.”

For example, we celebrate outcomes. We highlight access. We reward visibility and results. We are taught how to ask, how to position ourselves, how to receive. But we are not always taught how to honor the person who made it possible. So we become skilled at accessing what we need, while remaining underdeveloped in acknowledging those who provide it.

Over time, this creates relationships that feel uneven. Not always visibly fractured, but quietly strained. Because when we consistently receive without recognizing the source, we begin to treat people as pathways rather than as partners. We value what flows to us more than who it flows from.

This matters now more than ever.

We are living in a time that is complex, demanding, and often overwhelming. Many of us are navigating uncertainty, carrying responsibilities, and leaning on one another in ways that are both visible and unseen. In moments like these, relationships are not optional—they are essential. And if we misunderstand the relationship between the “water” and the “well,” we risk damaging the very connections we depend on.

Part of that misunderstanding comes from our failure to recognize the cost of what people
give.

There is always a cost.

When someone listens, it costs them time.

When someone supports us emotionally, it costs them energy.

When someone offers wisdom, it often comes from something they have endured,
processed, and learned.

When someone shows up consistently, it costs them presence, attention, and sometimes
even parts of themselves they have not yet had the chance to restore.

If we only focus on what we receive and never consider what it required, we unintentionally diminish the value of the relationship.

And that is why we must learn how to care for the “well.”

Caring for the “well” begins with specificity. It is not enough to say, “I appreciate you.” While those words matter, they often lack the depth that true acknowledgment requires. Instead, we must name what was given and why it mattered.

Caring for the “well” also means remaining connected beyond moments of need. To reach out without an agenda. To say, “I was thinking about you today and wanted to check in.”

Reciprocity is essential. Even if it does not take the same form, we are still responsible for contributing to the relationship.

Finally, caring for the “well” requires us to learn how others “receive” appreciation and make our gratitude just as specific as our requests.

Reminder: And then, there are those of us who are the “well.”

The ones people call.
The ones people lean on.
The ones who show up—again and again.

Being the “well” is a gift. It is a calling. It is sacred work.

But it is not permission to be depleted.

If you are the “well,” you must also take responsibility for your sustainability.

As you move through your relationships, remember:

The “water” is what you receive.
The “well” is who made it possible.

And we need them both.

May you recognize the “wells” in your life and honor them with intention and truth.

I shared more about this in this week’s podcast episode, and I hope it meets you wherever you are. I invite you to listen to the episode here on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and other platforms.

Blessings!
SharRon

Your Reputation Is More Important Than Revenge

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on Your Reputation Is More Important Than Revenge

Many years ago, my elders shared a piece of wisdom with me that I didn’t fully understand at the time.

They said simply, “Your reputation is more important than revenge.”

Like many lessons that come from elders, the words sounded wise but distant. They felt like something meant for someone else’s life—someone else’s circumstances. At the time, I had no idea that life would eventually place me in situations where those words would become not just meaningful, but necessary.

And that’s exactly what happened!

About 15 years ago, I experienced a betrayal that forced me to confront the depth of that wisdom. Someone I trusted deeply began spreading falsehoods about me. These were not small misunderstandings or careless remarks. The statements were damaging and deliberate, and they reached into areas of my life that mattered deeply—my work, my reputation, my family, and the trust I had built with others over many years.

The experience was painful in ways that are difficult to describe. It affected my business. It affected my health. It shook my confidence and forced me to question whether the truth about who I KNEW I was would be strong enough to withstand the vitriol of someone’s lies.

If you have ever had someone gossip about you, misrepresent your character, or distort the work you have done, then you understand how destabilizing that experience can be. In moments like that, the instinct to retaliate can be very strong. We want to correct the record. We want people to see the truth. Sometimes we even want the person who hurt us to feel the same pain they caused us.

Yet over time, I learned something that completely changed how I respond to betrayal, public attacks, and misrepresentation.

I learned that …. Protecting your reputation requires strategy, not reaction.

That realization eventually led me to develop what I call The Five A’s of Protecting Your Reputation. This framework has helped me move through many painful experiences with greater clarity, dignity, and intention. I share more about the subject on the Deciding To Soar Podcast: Living Life Your Own Way.  (Click to listen)

Below is the process I now use whenever I find myself facing situations where my reputation, work, or character may be at risk.

Step 1: Acknowledge the Wound

The first step is honesty.

When someone betrays you, spreads misinformation about you, or misrepresents your work, the pain can be very real. Many people try to skip over this step by pretending they are unaffected. They tell themselves they need to “be strong” or “move on.”

But healing cannot begin until we acknowledge what actually happened.

Suppressing pain does not make it disappear. Instead, it often resurfaces later, distorting our judgment and affecting our emotional well-being.

Acknowledging the wound might look like journaling about the situation, talking with a trusted friend, or simply admitting to yourself that what happened was painful, embarrassing, disruptive, or just low-down.

Naming the hurt is not weakness. It is clarity.

Reflection Question: Where might you be minimizing a wound that deserves to be acknowledged?

Step 2: Assess the Impact
Once you have acknowledged the emotional reality of the situation, the next step is to assess the impact.

What actually happened?

Did someone misrepresent your work? Did someone spread misinformation about you? Did someone attempt to damage your credibility or reputation? Did someone steal sensitive or divulge sensitive data?

It is important to examine the situation carefully before responding. Emotional pain can sometimes magnify our perception of events, but clarity helps us move from reaction to strategy.

Assessment also allows us to understand the difference between perceived harm and actual consequences.

This step helps ensure that our response is thoughtful rather than impulsive.

Reflection Question: Am I responding to the facts of the situation, or to the emotional shock of the moment?

Step 3: Arrange Your Response

This is the moment when wisdom begins to shape action.

Once you understand what has happened and how it may affect you, the next step is to arrange your response.

And here is something many people overlook: sometimes the most powerful response is silence.

Not every situation requires immediate confrontation. Sometimes, allowing time to pass reveals more truth than reacting quickly ever could.

At this stage, it is helpful to ask a critical question: Will my response escalate the conflict, or elevate my integrity?

Escalation often happens when we react from a place of anger or humiliation. However, elevation happens when we respond in ways that protect our dignity, affirm our values, and position us favorably for our future.

Arranging your response may involve seeking counsel from mentors, trusted advisors, or people who understand the broader context of the situation.

Remember, the goal is not simply to defend yourself in the moment. The goal is to protect your long-term reputation and minimize the impact on your career, family, and spirit.

Reflection Question: Am I choosing escalation or elevation?

Step 4: Activate the Plan

Once you have arranged a thoughtful response, the next step is activation.

Activation means implementing your plan with intention, courage, precision, and clarity.

For some people, activation may involve addressing misinformation directly and correcting the record. In other situations, activation may involve documenting the truth, strengthening professional boundaries, securing legal representation, or allowing your body of work to speak for itself.

Activation is NOT about proving someone wrong. It is about standing firmly in what you know to be true about yourself and the situation.

And, activation should also include an important element that many people overlook: healing. Why? When betrayal affects your emotional well-being, ignoring that pain can lead to decisions that compromise your peace or integrity.

My friend, healing may involve reflection, spiritual grounding, counseling, or reconnecting with supportive community.

Remember, spiritual and emotional healing is not separate from your strategy. It is part of the strategy.

Reflection Question: What action would allow me to stand in my integrity without sacrificing my peace?

Step 5: Continue Healing and Stay Open

The final step may be the most challenging.

When someone harms you, your natural instinct may be to protect yourself by becoming guarded or withdrawn because betrayal can make us suspicious of others and hesitant to trust again.

Yet closing ourselves off from possibility creates another form of loss.

So, even though it’s difficult, try to stay open. Just to be clear: Remaining open does not mean ignoring what happened. Instead, it means refusing to allow someone else’s behavior to define your future or dictate how you move in the world.

Also, staying open allows you to maintain your confidence, your creativity, and your willingness to engage with new opportunities and relationships. That’s key!

More importantly, staying open is a powerful way of reclaiming your identity and your voice.

Reflection Question: What would it look like for you to remain open while staying anchored in your truth?

 

Looking back now, I realize that the wisdom my elders shared all those years ago carried far more depth than I understood at the time. And, I am so glad I listened with my heart, and not just with my ears.

Remember…..

Revenge is fleeting. It may feel satisfying in the moment, but its effects rarely last and can ruin your life.

Reputation, however, is built slowly over time. It is formed through integrity, consistency, and character repeated across many seasons of life. And when your reputation is rooted in those qualities, it will speak for you in places where you may never be able to speak for yourself.

That is why the lesson still holds true today.

Yes, your reputation is more important than revenge.

Not because revenge is impossible, but because YOUR reputation—when built on integrity—has the power to stand the test of time.

Please listen to the podcast and subscribe to my YouTube channel while you are there. I would really appreciate your support. Click here.

Blessings,

SharRon

Witnessing Softness In Black Women

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We rarely talk about softness when we talk about Black women.

We talk about her strength.

We talk about her leadership.

We talk about her resilience.

Yet softness may be one of the most sacred parts of her humanity. ( I explore this topic more in the Deciding To Soar podcast. You can listen on YouTube. It’s also available on Apple and other platforms.)

Let’s be clear….

Softness is not fragility. It is not weakness. It is not a lack of resolve.

Softness is a Black woman’s capacity for tenderness, empathy, levity, and joy without the burden of wearing armor.

And softness matters because no one is meant to survive on strength alone.

Yet culturally, there is an unspoken expectation that Black women should do exactly that — survive alone.

That is why Black women are praised for their strength, resilience, and unshakability.

But over time, those adjectives become a prison.

Inside that prison, her softness is overlooked because the world grows accustomed to her endurance.

Her tenderness is ignored because her competence is mistaken for invulnerability.

Her need for care is dismissed because she handles things “so well.”

And sometimes she is stretched, tested, and even attacked because her ability to withstand pressure is misinterpreted as invincibility.

But when her softness goes unwitnessed, there is a cost.

Exhaustion becomes normalized.

Boundaries are crossed.

Rest is reframed as indulgent.

Vulnerability is misread as deficiency.

Over time, she armors herself — not because she lacks softness, but because the environment does not feel safe enough to hold it.

Even though the world may call her protective response resilience, it isn’t.

It is survival, and survival is not the same as thriving.

Softness!

It is NOT a reward for endurance.

It is not care extended only after “performing” excellence.

It is not gentleness extended only after enduring hardship.

Softness is a right, a birthright.

It is where her nervous system settles. Where healing begins. Where wholeness is restored.

And softness is where growth happens because REAL growth can’t happen under constant pressure.

It happens in environments of safety, respect, & care.

My friend, softness is fertile ground.

It is where creativity returns.

Where imagination expands.

Where new versions of herself are allowed to emerge and bloom.

The blessing is, when Black women are allowed to be soft, they do not shrink; they expand.

And their expansion strengthens families. Stabilizes communities. Elevates organizations. Contributes to the world.

That’s why witnessing her softness is not sentimental.

It’s strategic.

It’s healing.

It’s liberating.

It’s an act of respect.

An act of honor.

A sign of leadership.

Strength may be what the world demands of her, but softness is what sustains her.

This Black History Month, may we “witness” Black women not only for what they produce or survive, but also for what they feel, hope for, and need.

And may we build workplaces where their strength is appreciated, and softness is protected.

Blessings!

P.S. – I share more in my newsletter. Subscribe here. 

Seven Lessons on Overflow, Contemplation, and Sacred Sisterhood

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There are seasons in life when something in you whispers, begin.

Recently, I recorded my first interview on Deciding to Soar: Living Life Your Own Way. It was not perfect. It was unscripted. It was unedited. It was human. And I did it anyway.

Why?

Growth does not require perfection. It requires progression. And progression requires motion because we learn as we go and as we do.

And for that, I am deeply grateful that Dr. Vikki Johnson was willing to walk with me in that imperfect beginning. Thank you, Dr. Vikki. (You can learn more about Dr. Vikki Johnson at her website. Click here.)

 

In my soul-nourishing conversation with Dr. Vikki Johnson, we explored seven deeply layered themes that speak to women navigating midlife, career transitions, contemplation, and personal evolution.

1. Operate From Overflow, Not Capacity

Vikki shared a story her grandmother taught her about a coffee cup and saucer. Her grandmother would pour her coffee into a cup, and when it spilled into the saucer, she would drink from the saucer first. Her grandmother explained: What is in the cup is for you. What spills into the saucer is what you give away.

This illustration is more than charming nostalgia. It is an instruction.

We are often conditioned to give from our cup — to meet the needs of others before meeting our own. But nourishment is not selfish; it’s sacred. It is vital to our well-being, wholeness, and wellness.

When we give from a place of depletion, resentment grows. When we give from overflow, generosity feels natural.

2. Contemplation Creates Liberation

Contemplation is not laziness. It is courage.

It is sitting still long enough to ask:

  • Who told me that?
  • Is this belief mine?
  • Is this aligned with who I am now?
  • Is that perspective edifying?

Inquiry is the birthplace of freedom. We cannot liberate ourselves from inherited narratives, stereotypes, and cultural conditioning unless we first question them.

We must think deeply to move freely.

3. Evolution Requires Release

Growth and grief walk hand in hand because evolution requires release.

We may grieve:

  • Old identities
  • Familiar environments
  • Roles we once held
  • Rules we used to follow
  • Relationships we have
  • Versions of ourselves that once felt safe

Grief does not mean we are wrong. It often means we are expanding.

4. Peace Is Practiced

Peace is not accidental. It is intentional.

It requires boundaries. It requires restraint. It requires choosing not to respond, not to overextend, not to internalize what is not ours.

Peace must be protected by YOU!

5. Values Govern Our Lives

Dr. Vikki spoke about the importance of identifying core values.

When we know what truly matters to us, our values govern our decisions. They shape our yes and our no. They help us set boundaries. They reduce our susceptibility to seeking validation from others.

When you are aligned with your values, you move differently. You do not chase approval or acceptance. You walk in integrity, even if it means walking alone.

6. Covenant Relationships Sustain Growth

Not all relationships are covenantal.

Covenant relationships are rooted in integrity, safety, and witnessing. They allow space for imperfection, evolution, and truth.

We need people who can mirror our growth without envy and hold our complexity without judgment.

Sacred sisterhood is sustaining.

7. Begin Before You Feel Ready

This episode itself is evidence: perfection is not the prerequisite for purpose.

Progression requires motion. And motion teaches what preparation alone cannot.

If you are in midlife, reimagining your career, or quietly becoming someone new, begin.

You will refine and pivot along the way.

 

If this message resonates with you, please share it with someone who may need it. Growth multiplies when wisdom is passed forward.

Also, I invite you to subscribe to my YouTube channel. Your subscription helps me continue building a platform rooted in authenticity, sisterhood, and purpose, which allows me to create more meaningful conversations and programming for people navigating transition and transformation.

And if you are not yet subscribed to my newsletter, I encourage you to join. It’s where I share deeper reflections, resources, and insights that may support you in your becoming.

Let’s stay connected. Let’s continue to dare to soar higher — together.

Blessings!

SharRon

Do You See Us? The Healing Power of Witnessing Black Women

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Last week, I began a series on the power of witnessing.

Based on the feedback I received, it resonated deeply. Many of you shared that it named something you’ve been feeling—at work, in leadership, and during seasons of transition and uncertainty—something you hadn’t quite had language for.

So today, I want to continue that conversation, with the hope of supporting all of us in our efforts to build more loving, affirming, and supportive communities.

And before I go any further, I want to again define witnessing for anyone who may be joining us for the first time.

Witnessing is not simply noticing someone’s presence.

To witness is to:

  • see truth clearly
  • and testify to it out loud

When you witness someone, you are saying:

I see what you can do, and I value who you are.
I recognize your humanity, even if the world does not.
I honor your contribution, even if it goes unrewarded.
I remember you, even when history or leadership tries to forget you.

Remeber, witnessing isn’t about applause. It’s not a symbolic celebration or surface-level praise.

Witnessing is about seeing people and their realities clearly—and responding with care.

As we enter Black History Month—a time to honor the lives, legacies, and contributions of Black people—I want to pause and speak with intention, especially to Black women, as we continue the conversation I began last week.

Although many of us are navigating job loss and career uncertainty, research consistently confirms that Black women are experiencing higher rates of job loss, greater financial instability, and more frequent career transitions than any other demographic group.

Unfortunately, I have seen this play out in boardrooms, ministries, and community spaces alike, where Black women continue to execute strategies, solve problems, and steady institutions even as their own job security and financial stability are threatened.

In moments like this, witnessing is not optional. It is vital to nourish the soul and support a person’s dignity.

And as we all endeavor to witness each other in confidence-building and dignity-affirming ways, I want to share five specific ways we can witness Black women—ways that protect humanity, interrupt erasure, and support healing.

1. Witness Their Strengths (Talent, Skills, and Expertise)

When we talk about witnessing the strength of Black women, we are not only talking about emotional endurance. We are also talking about talent, expertise, insight, wisdom,  creativity, and skill.

Witnessing here means naming what Black women do well—how they think, lead, solve problems, create, and elevate both the work and the people around them.

Why this matters:
When talent and expertise are shared without care, acknowledgment, or appreciation, it can feel like exploitation. Over time, that exploitation can feel like extraction and usury.

Also, being constantly relied upon for what we do well—without being rewarded—undermines confidence, squashes potential, and discourages continued contribution. It breeds resentment, leads to exhaustion, and discourages participation.

What witnessing strengths can sound like:

“I see how talented you are in this situation.”
“You are an effective writer and leader, and your creativity elevates this work.”
“Your expertise is shaping the outcome in meaningful ways, and I want to name that.”

2. Witness Their Success

Black women continue to achieve success (based on their own definitions and own terms)  despite systemic barriers, unequal access, and constant scrutiny. Yet that success is often minimized, delayed, denied, erased, or credited elsewhere.

Witnessing success means naming achievement clearly, without qualification or minimization. It means acknowledging that Black women have achieved, overcome obstacles, and made sacrifices to accomplish their goals.

It is also a recognition that their success often came at a high emotional, physical, and spiritual cost.

Why this matters:
Over time, failure to witness success teaches society to discount, disrespect, and deny the contributions, inventions, and impact of Black women. It also teaches Black women to shrink instead of shine and to minimize the ways they transform the world.

What witnessing success can sound like:

“Your success is not accidental. It reflects your leadership, skill, and persistence.”
“You are a difference maker, a game changer, and a trailblazer. What you have accomplished on your own terms serves as a model for women coming behind you.”
“I appreciate you and I am deeply inspired by the sacrifices you made and the business you created to support young people.”

3. Witness Their Struggle

Black women are frequently expected to perform without pause, to handle crisis without acknowledgment, and to absorb emotional, spiritual, and relational strain without relief.

What is often unnamed is this: the ability to navigate chaos, complexity, and crisis comes at a cost.

Managing complexity, navigating chaos, and juggling mutiple responsibilities takes an emotional, spiritual, and physical toll on the body, mind, and soul. And these tolls frequently go unnoticed and unnamed until they manifest as exhaustion, illness, or disengagement.

Why this matters:
Unwitnessed struggle leads to burnout—not because of a lack of resilience, but because of prolonged invisibility, lack of support, lack of protection, and unmet care.

What witnessing can sound like:

“I see how much this has required of you.”
“What you’re carrying has weight.”
“Even though it looks easy,  I know that it is hard and feels heavy.”

4. Witness Their Sadness

Sadness is often overlooked because strength is expected. That expectation is reinforced by historical narratives that normalize Black pain and mythicize Black endurance. Both do Black women a profound disservice.

There is also shame attached to sadness, grief, and depression. In some cultures, vulnerability and transparency are even misread or misunderstood as weakness, which further increases feelings of shame and isolation.

Why this matters:
Sadness that goes unseen turns into sickness. And sickness eventually erodes well-being, wellness, and wholeness.

What witnessing can sound like:

“You don’t have to be strong right now.”
“Your feelings are real, and they matter.”
“The situation is heavy and draining.  You are not flawed for feeling it.”

5. Witness Their Shifts

Witnessing shifts means affirming that change is allowed and welcomed.

It means understanding that growth should be supported—not punished or penalized.

The truth is: emotional/spiritual healing, establishing boundaries, and making new choices will disrupt family dynamics, alter relationships, and change access to people who demand older versions of ourselves. In fact, making self-enriching and self-affirming decisions can feel threatening to people who benefited from us deprioritizing our needs, de-centering our wants, and denying our true identities.

Why this matters:
Shifts without affirmation can feel destabilizing rather than liberating. People need to know they are permitted, encouraged, and celebrated as they evolve.  Our transformation should be honored. Our growth should never cost us respect, belonging, or safety.

What witnessing can sound like:

“I see how you are changing, and I honor the courage it takes to choose yourself.”
“I see how you are growing—and your growth inspires me to grow too.”
“I see how you move differently now, and by watching you, I’m learning how to honor myself more.”

This week, I released a podcast episode titled: “Do You See Us? The Healing Power of Witnessing Black Women.”

In it, I explore these five ways of witnessing more deeply—why they matter, how they heal, and how they protect dignity and interrupt erasure. You can listen on Apple, YouTube, or your platform of choice.

I invite you to listen. I invite you to reflect.  Most of all, I invite you—especially during Black History Month—to seek out opportunities to witness Black women and to allow yourself to be witnessed by people who truly value you.

Remember, Black women do not need to be fixed. They need to be WITNESSED! They need to be protected, appreciated, and affirmed.

This week, ask yourself:

  • Who is a Black woman in my life whose humanity I MUST witness more fully—starting today?
  • What might I, as a Black woman—or as a loving human—do to witness myself more fully?
  • How can I witness the unique realities of others in more life-enriching, soul-nourishing ways?

*If this message resonates and you find yourself longing to be seen, affirmed, and held in a thoughtful space, I want to extend a personal invitation.

In March, I’ll be offering a small-group witnessing experience—a guided, intimate space designed for reflection, truth-telling, and soul-centered support.

  • The group will include up to five women.

  • I also have two openings for one-on-one work for those who desire more personalized support.

If you’re interested in joining the group or learning more about working with me individually, please email me directly for details. I would be honored to walk with you during this season.

Sending you blessings as I witness you,
SharRon

You Don’t Need To Do More Work. You Need To Be Witnessed.

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog, Uncategorized. No Comments on You Don’t Need To Do More Work. You Need To Be Witnessed.

One of the most important lessons my elders taught me in my early twenties was this:

You don’t need to do more work. You need to be witnessed.

They were not discouraging excellence or effort.

They were challenging a dangerous assumption that performance and labor alone guarantee elevation.

They understood something many of us eventually learn the hard way: that some people will be expected to carry more, prove longer, and work harder—even when they are already doing excellent work. They knew that exemplary performance alone does not always lead to protection, recognition, or advancement.

That’s why they said, you need a witness.

The word ‘witnessing’ is one we often hear in religious and spiritual spaces. At its core, it means to see truth and to testify to it. Which means that a witness is not a casual spectator or a passive observer. It is someone who names what they see and allows that truth to shape trust, inspire growth, and expand potential.

This is why witnessing matters just as much in workplaces and organizations as it does in spiritual settings.

And to be clear: witnessing is more than feedback. Feedback evaluates performance. Witnessing affirms personhood.

Witnessing says, I see you. I see what you bring. I see who you are becoming—and I’m willing to name it.

If you pause and think about your own career, you likely remember moments when you felt witnessed.

  • Moments when you were invited to the table and trusted to speak.
  • When your growth was not only celebrated but compensated.
  • When people appreciated your work and your wisdom.
  • When you felt visible and valued.

Feeling seen and appreciated had a real impact on your life. It nourished your soul. It built your confidence. It freed you to contribute at the highest level—not out of fear or over-functioning, but out of trust and belonging.

And most of us also remember the times when we were not witnessed.

  • The seasons when we were told that we were reliable, but never considered ready.
  • When we were asked to carry the load, but not given the opportunity to lead.
  • When we were expected to produce, but never promoted.
  • When you had to deliver big results with few resources.
  • When our work was used, but we were never credited.

Those experiences didn’t just stall our careers. They left hurtful marks on our spirits. And over time, feeling unseen or undervalued depleted our energy, eroded our trust, and lowered our level of engagement—not because we lacked resilience, but because we felt extracted from rather than affirmed and invested in.

What I know for sure is this: witnessing matters especially now.

Why?

Many of us are navigating seasons of transition, uncertainty, and reinvention. And while witnessing may not directly address the emotions that come with change, it does something just as important: it reminds you who you are.

It reaffirms strengths that may have been overshadowed by loss, disruption, or disappointment.

 It stabilizes your identity when everything around you feels unstable.

And, it anchors you in truth while you discern your next step.

That’s why witnessing is not a luxury or a soft leadership concept. It is a difference maker. It is a leadership imperative. It is an indicator of high emotional intelligence.

After decades of coaching high-performing, high-values, and high-impact people, what I know for sure is this: when people feel honored—not just evaluated—they expand their capacity to perform. And just as importantly, they expand their capacity to honor themselves and others.

When that happens, trust deepens. Cultures shift. Problems are solved. Solutions are created. And leadership becomes more humane, more sustainable, and more whole.

As you sit with this reflection, consider these questions.

  • Where in your work have you felt most seen—and why?
  • Where have you felt productive, but invisible?
  • How do you typically respond when you are not witnessed?
  • And when you are witnessed, do you name how empowering that experience is?

You might also consider where witnessing could change something beyond work. Where in your personal life could being seen—or offering that seeing to someone else—restore trust or connection? What parts of you long to be named, acknowledged, or developed more fully?

And if you are spiritually inclined, you might gently ask: In what ways do I experience—or long to experience—being witnessed by my Creator? What helps me recognize that kind of seeing and validation?

If this reflection resonates, I invite you to listen to this week’s Deciding To Soar: Living Life Your Own Way podcast episode, where I explore the five dimensions of witnessing—what they look like, why they matter, and how they shape confidence, leadership, and trust. You can listen on YouTube, Apple, or other platforms.

Over the coming weeks, I’ll continue exploring witnessing across different areas of life—because in seasons of uncertainty, disruption, and global change, witnessing matters now more than ever.

If you have questions about witnessing—at work, in leadership, in relationships, or in your own healing—I welcome them. I’ll weave those questions into future writing, conversations, and workshops.

My Blessing For You: May you be seen for who you are, not just for what you produce.
May your work be witnessed, your gifts named, and your humanity honored.
And may you have the courage to witness others with the same care.

I SEE YOU!

SharRon

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