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You See Based on Where You Sit

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on You See Based on Where You Sit

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the conversations we have when life becomes complicated.

You know…the conversations that happen when we’re trying to decide whether to leave a job, start a business, retire from our job, write a book, rebuild our confidence, navigate faith, strengthen a relationship, leave a marriage, move to a different city, or simply figure out what comes next. Yes, those conversations. 😀

Over the past few weeks, I’ve had many of those conversations with my friends and clients. Although each person’s story was unique, one statement kept surfacing:

“I asked for advice, but I left the conversation feeling worse.”

That sentence stayed with me because it saddens me when people ask for advice and then leave the conversations feeling defeated, ashamed, and belittled. Nobody deserves to feel that way, especially when they are being courageous and vulnerable enough to ask for help.

The statement also reminded me of something my elders taught me many years ago. They would often say, “You see based on where you sit.”

At the time, I thought my elders were simply talking about perspective.

But looking back, I realize they were teaching me something much deeper. They were teaching me: 1) how to understand people, 2) how to understand myself, and 3) how to recognize the kind of wisdom I would need throughout my life.

So, What Did My Elders Mean?

My elders were trying to help me understand that each of us sits in many different “seats.”

Some seats are obvious. Others are invisible. Some are chosen. Others are assigned.

For example:

Race is a seat.

Gender is a seat.

Age is a seat.

Faith is a seat.

Being a caregiver is a seat.

Being an entrepreneur is a seat.

Living with a disability is a seat.

Being a first-generation college graduate is a seat.

Military service is a seat.

Grief is a seat.

Poverty is a seat.

Privilege is a seat.

And the list goes on.

Every one of us occupies many seats, and those seats shape how we experience the world.

Those seats influence what we notice.

What we fear.

What we prepare for.

What opportunities we believe are available to us.

What risks we’re willing to take.

What societal hurdles we anticipate and MUST address.

And yes, they influence the kind of wisdom we need to be successful.

NOTE: The seats we sit in do not determine our worth. Nor do they define the fullness of who we are. But our seats are valuable sources of insight that help us understand how to move wisely and effectively through the world while remaining true to who we are.

Why Does This Matter?

Understanding our seats can help us. Let me share a personal example of why.

Early in my corporate career, I received advice from someone I deeply respected. His advice itself wasn’t wrong. But it simply wasn’t complete or took into account who I was as a young Black woman leader who was leading a group of white men who resented being led by me. (I am writing about this story in my upcoming book.)

Here is what happened: He encouraged me to be more direct, more assertive, and more willing to challenge ideas in meetings. He thought my behaving in that way would make me appear decisive, confident, and executive.

But his advice backfired!!!! 😭😟

When I followed his advice, I was often perceived very differently. Instead of being seen as confident, I was viewed as confrontational. Instead of being seen as decisive, I was viewed as aggressive. Instead of being seen as thoughtful and strategic, I was called the B word. People made all kinds of disparaging comments behind my back. 😢

Following his advice affected my credibility, my reputation, and even my ability to lead my team effectively. It was a career-heartbreaking experience, and something that took years of intense therapy to process and recover from.

That painful experience taught me something I have never forgotten: GOOD advice isn’t universal. It’s contextual.

I’ve seen the same reality in many other situations.

I’ve seen younger professionals criticized for approaching work differently, even though they entered adulthood during a vastly different time in history.

I’ve seen it in faith communities, where two people can worship in the same sanctuary yet experience the same faith community in profoundly different ways.

I’ve seen similar situations with people who are differently abled, veterans, first-generation college graduates, first-generation entrepreneurs, caregivers, and countless others.

Why? Because…

Different seats.

Different realities.

Different variables.

…create different outcomes.

Why Should We Care?

Because I believe you and I deserve GOOD advice.

Not advice that simply sounds impressive.

Not advice based only on someone else’s experience.

You and I deserve advice that honors the fullness of our lives and appreciates the fullness of who we are.

You deserve advice that:

  • considers your realities.
  • respects your complexities.
  • acknowledges your responsibilities.
  • recognizes your opportunities and your obstacles.
  • helps you become more strategic and savvy.
  • considers your talents, gifts, and abilities.

We all deserve advice that leaves us feeling:

  • more confident, not more confused.
  • more empowered, not more defeated.
  • more resourceful, not more inadequate.
  • more directed, not more denied.

That’s the kind of wisdom every one of us deserves.

Four Gentle Reminders

So…as you continue making important decisions, please remember these four factors.

First, honor the seats you occupy.

Your seats are not weaknesses. They are part of your lived experience, and they offer valuable insight into how you navigate the world.

Second, pay attention to whether people understand your reality.

No one has to share every seat you occupy, but they should care enough to understand the ones that matter most.

Third, evaluate advice before you apply it.

Every piece of advice should be filtered through the realities of your own life, your values, your responsibilities, and your purpose.

Finally, remain discerning.

Someone may have remarkable education, extraordinary experience, or tremendous success and still not be emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, or socially equipped to guide you through a particular season of your life.

Remember: Discernment isn’t distrust. It’s wisdom.

As you reflect this week, please take a few moments to ask these questions before you implement ANY advice you receive that will impact your life:

  • What seats have shaped the way I experience the world?
  • How have those seats influenced the opportunities I pursue, the challenges I anticipate, and the wisdom I need?
  • Am I honoring my own lived experience when I make important decisions?

Let’s Continue the Conversation…

👉️ If this message resonated with you, I hope you’ll listen to this week’s podcast, where I explore this conversation in greater depth.

👉 Then join me on YouTube and continue the discussion. I’d love to hear about the “seats” that have shaped your life and the lessons they’ve taught you.

👉️ Also, please subscribe to the podcast. I can only grow the community through your support.

💜💙 If someone came to mind while reading this, share it with them. Sometimes the greatest gift we can offer another person is helping them feel seen and reminding them that they are not alone. 💜🩷

Until next time, honor your seats and continue to DARE TO SOAR HIGHER, trusting that your seats will help you be who YOU were called to be.

 

Benediction

May you honor the many seats that have shaped your journey without allowing them to diminish your purpose or your possibilities.

May your lived experiences become sources of wisdom that help you navigate your life with greater clarity, courage, and confidence.

May you find advisors who care enough to understand the realities you navigate, wise enough to recognize what they don’t know, and humble enough to listen and learn.

May the counsel you receive leave you more informed, more resourceful, and better equipped to make life-enriching decisions that nourish your soul and support who you are becoming.

And as you encounter people sitting in seats different from your own, may you offer them the same curiosity, compassion, and grace you deserve, trusting that your seats can help you become even more of who YOU were called to be.

Blessings!

SharRon

How to Evaluate Your Next Career Move: 6 Questions to Ask Before Accepting a Job

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Uncategorized. No Comments on How to Evaluate Your Next Career Move: 6 Questions to Ask Before Accepting a Job

Years ago, after earning my MBA and building a successful career in corporate America, I made a decision that puzzled almost everyone around me.

I decided to become an aerobics instructor.

The reactions came almost immediately.

“Why would you do that?”

“You have an MBA.”

“You already have a successful career.”

“Isn’t teaching aerobics beneath you?”

At the time, I understood their concern.

In the 1990s, careers were expected to follow a fairly predictable path. Success was often measured by titles, promotions, and climbing the corporate ladder. Choosing to teach aerobics after earning a graduate degree simply didn’t fit the script.

Looking back, I realize they weren’t questioning the job itself.

They were questioning my judgment.

But today, the world of work looks very different.

Layoffs. Career transitions. Burnout. Retirement. Reinvention.

More people than ever are asking difficult questions about what comes next.

The question I hear most often is:

“What job should I take?”

I believe there’s a better—and perhaps more loving—question.

“What kind of work will best support the life I’m trying to build and the person I’m becoming?”

That one question completely changed the way I evaluate opportunities.

I’ve learned that one question isn’t enough.

Before making an important career decision, I encourage people to evaluate every opportunity through six lenses. Together, they provide a more complete picture of whether a job is simply a paycheck—or whether it’s helping you build the life you’re meant to live.

Six Questions Worth Asking Before Your Next Career Move – Click here to listen on YouTube. 

Position

Don’t begin by asking whether the title sounds impressive.

Ask where this opportunity positions you to grow.

Some jobs are destinations.

Others are bridges.

The right opportunity may strengthen your confidence, develop new skills, expand your network, restore your health, or prepare you for a future you cannot yet see.

Sometimes the position you need today isn’t the position you want forever. Sometimes it’s the position that makes tomorrow possible.

Ask yourself:

What will this position make possible in my life that isn’t possible today?

Perception

One of the hardest parts of making an unconventional decision is managing other people’s opinions.

People are entitled to their perception.

They are not entitled to define your purpose.

Their perception belongs to them.

Your purpose belongs to you.

If you’re constantly making decisions to satisfy someone else’s expectations, you’ll eventually lose sight of your own.

The people around you may never fully understand your decision, and that’s okay. They aren’t living your life.

Ask yourself:

Am I making this decision based on my values or someone else’s expectations?

Pressure

Let’s call a thing a thing.

Adult peer pressure is real.

It doesn’t sound like it did when we were teenagers.

Instead, it whispers,

“You’re overqualified.”

“People will think you’re settling.”

“You worked too hard for your degree to do that.”

Those voices are powerful because they appeal to our desire to be respected and admired.

Here’s the question I ask myself whenever I feel that tension:

Would I still choose this opportunity if no one else ever knew I accepted it?

Sit with that question for a moment.

Because once we recognize peer pressure for what it is, it begins to lose its power.

We stop making decisions to impress people and start making decisions that genuinely support the life we’re trying to build.

Ask yourself:

Am I choosing this opportunity because it’s right for me, or because I’m hoping someone else will approve of it?

Pay 

Money matters.

It provides choices, stability, and opportunities.

But it shouldn’t be the only way we evaluate work.

Today, before asking, “How much does this job pay?” I ask another question.

“How is this opportunity paying me?”

Is it increasing my confidence?

Expanding my leadership?

Teaching me something new?

Introducing me to people who will shape my future?

Restoring my joy?

Strengthening my character?

Sometimes the greatest return on an opportunity isn’t found in the paycheck.

It’s found in the person you’re becoming.

Ask yourself:

What am I earning here beyond money?

Preparation

For years, I thought becoming an aerobics instructor was simply a side job.

Looking back, I realize it was preparation.

At the time, I thought I was teaching aerobics.

Looking back, I realize God was teaching me.

Every class strengthened abilities I would later use as a speaker, coach, author, minister, and leader.

I was learning how to read a room.

How to communicate with energy.

How to encourage people from different backgrounds.

How to help people believe they could do more than they thought possible.

What looked like an unconventional decision became preparation for opportunities I couldn’t yet imagine.

Sometimes the opportunity that doesn’t make sense today is quietly preparing you for tomorrow.

Ask yourself:

How might this opportunity be preparing me for something I cannot yet see?

Permission

This may be the most important question of all.

Does this opportunity give me permission to become more fully myself?

Teaching aerobics gave me permission to express parts of myself that had been quietly waiting to emerge.

It gave me permission to lead.

To encourage.

To create.

To laugh.

To connect.

To discover gifts that couldn’t fully develop inside my corporate role alone.

I wasn’t becoming someone different.

I was becoming someone more complete.

The right work doesn’t simply provide a paycheck.

Sometimes it gives you permission to become a more complete person and fully express who you already are.

Ask yourself:

Will this opportunity allow me to become more fully myself?

Closing Reflection

Looking back, becoming an aerobics instructor wasn’t beneath me.

It met a need during that season of my life.

It also prepared me for opportunities I never could have predicted.

What looked like an unconventional decision became one of the most important investments in my future.

The right opportunity doesn’t simply help you earn a living.

Sometimes it helps you build a life.

Sometimes it helps you become the person you were created to be.

If you’re standing at a career crossroads today, I hope you’ll give yourself permission to ask better questions before making your next decision.

The answers may change far more than your career.

They may change your life.

 

If Want To Continue the Conversation…

👉 Share this article with someone navigating a career transition. You never know who may need a new way to think about their next step.

👉 Listen to this week’s podcast, where I share the full story behind one of the most unconventional decisions I ever made—and why I’d make it again. Click here.

👉 If you’re navigating a career transition, retirement, or reinvention, I’ve opened a limited number of VIP coaching sessions this month. I’d be honored to help you think through your next chapter.

 

My friend, remember, don’t choose your next opportunity because it looks impressive.

Choose it because it faithfully supports the life you’re building and the person you’re becoming.

And most of all…

Keep growing.

Keep trusting.

Keep becoming.

Dare to soar higher, because the best is still yet to come.

Blessings,

SharRon

Benediction

May you have the courage to choose work that aligns with your values instead of someone else’s expectations.

May you recognize opportunities that prepare you, even when they don’t impress everyone around you.

May you trust that meaningful work often grows quietly before the world recognizes its value.

May you become an even greater advocate for the life you’ve been entrusted to live.

And may you never forget that the goal is not simply to find another job.

The goal is to become the person you were always created to be.

 

It’s Not About the Competence You Don’t Have. It’s About the Company You Keep!

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog. No Comments on It’s Not About the Competence You Don’t Have. It’s About the Company You Keep!

Have you ever noticed that some of the brightest, most accomplished people still struggle with life’s biggest decisions?

I have.

Over the years, I’ve watched remarkable people struggle to make decisions about retirement, careers, relationships, finances, purpose, and what they want their next chapter to be. The people who struggled didn’t lack education, experience, or confidence. They were thoughtful, capable people who had spent years solving problems, leading organizations, raising families, and making difficult decisions. They were the best of the best.

So why do they get stuck?

Because they needed a wider lens.

Let’s face it. When we’re standing in the middle of our own lives or arrive at a crossroads, it’s difficult to see all the possibilities in front of us. Of course, we may see the responsibilities, risks, competing priorities, and expectations. We may even see what could go wrong. But what we don’t always see are the options and opportunities that exist just beyond our current thinking and reality.

That’s why a statement I heard years ago resonates with me now more than ever: “It’s not about the competence you don’t have. It’s about the company you keep.”

When I first heard that statement, I appreciated it because it sounded wise. Today, I appreciate the statement because I’ve come to understand that the right relationships don’t simply support us. They expand our perspective. Each person offers a different lens through which to see our lives, and together those lenses help us see possibilities we might never have discovered on our own.

So let me introduce you to the five people I believe we all need, especially when we are navigating change, reinvention, uncertainty, or simply trying to decide what comes next.

1. The Person With Intellect

The question they help answer is:

What do we know?

These are the people who provide information, knowledge, research, analysis, data, and critical thinking.

When you’re trying to make a difficult decision, they help you sort through facts. They help you understand options, contingencies, and consequences. They help you think clearly and logically. They are excellent thought partners, strategic thinkers, and problem solvers who bring structure to complexity.

Their gift is clarity.

They don’t necessarily tell you what to do. They help you think better, bigger, and broader. They expand your understanding of a situation and ensure that your decisions are grounded in reality rather than assumptions.

2. The Person With Insight

The question they help answer is:

What does this mean?

Insight is different from information.

While intellect focuses on facts, insight focuses on meaning.

Insightful people see beneath the surface. They recognize patterns, motivations, consequences, and deeper truths that others often miss. They have an ability to understand not just what is happening, but why it is happening and why it matters.

Where intellect asks, “What are the facts?”

Insight asks, “What’s really happening here?”

Their gift is perspective.

They help us understand the larger story behind our circumstances and often reveal truths that are hidden beneath the surface of our immediate concerns.

3. The Person With Imagination

The question they help answer is:

What could be possible?

These are the visionaries.

The creators.

The possibility thinkers.

They help us see beyond our current reality.

Most people can see what is.

People with imagination can see what could be.

Their gift is possibility.

They remind us that our current circumstances do not dictate our future. They challenge inherited scripts, social expectations, limiting beliefs, and assumptions about what is possible. More importantly, they help us recognize that there is often far more available to us than we initially believe.

These are the people who remind us there is always more.

More growth.

More creativity.

More contribution.

More adventure.

More life.

4. The Person With Intuition

The question they help answer is:

What feels right?

Intuition is often misunderstood because it doesn’t operate through analysis or logic alone.

It is also different from insight.

Insight looks deeply into a situation to uncover meaning.

Intuition senses something before meaning is fully visible or mentally accessible.

It is an inner knowing. A deep sense of recognition. A feeling that something aligns, or doesn’t align, even before we can fully explain why.

I believe intuition is one of our God-given gifts. It often provides information that our minds have not yet fully processed or had access to. It helps us pay attention to signals, patterns, and possibilities that logic alone may overlook.

Their gift is discernment.

And during life’s most important decisions, discernment can be every bit as valuable as written information.

5. The Bridge Builder – “Intermediary”

The question they help answer is:

What connects?

These people connect people, ideas, opportunities, perspectives, and communities.

They see relationships where others see separation.

They recognize common ground where others see differences.

They introduce people to opportunities, ideas, and relationships that might otherwise never intersect.

Their gift is connection.

Many of the most meaningful opportunities in our lives begin when someone builds a bridge we could not build ourselves. A new friendship, mentor, community, career opportunity, or life direction often begins with a connection someone else had the wisdom, courage, and generosity to make.

Why These Relationships Matter?

Here’s the blessing:  when we begin to see more possibilities, we stop feeling limited by our current circumstances. We make better decisions, ask better questions, and move through life with greater courage, creativity, and clarity.

That’s why these relationships matter because….

The person with intellect helps us think.

The person with insight helps us understand.

The person with imagination helps us dream.

The person with intuition helps us discern.

The bridge builder helps us connect.

And together, they expand our perspective because the right people help us see a bigger, brighter, and better future that we might never have imagined on our own…. which ensures that we don’t settle for a life that doesn’t honor our goals, talents, and dreams.

This week, take a few quiet moments to think about the people you invite into your decision-making.

Ask yourself:

  • Who helps me think?
  • Who helps me understand?
  • Who helps me imagine?
  • Who helps me discern?
  • Who helps me connect?

Then ask one final question:  Which of these relationships might be missing from my life right now?

You Want To Continue the Conversation?

👉 Join the Conversation

I’m hosting a free one-hour workshop in the second week of July to explore these five types of relationships in greater depth. We’ll talk about how they help us navigate life’s major transitions and intentionally cultivate the kinds of relationships that expand our thinking and our possibilities.

If you’d like to join us, simply send me a message at SharRon@ SharRonJamison.com

👉 Watch This Week’s Conversation

If this article resonated with you, I invite you to continue the conversation by watching this week’s episode of Deciding to Soar: Living Life Your Own Way on YouTube. Click here. There, I expand on these ideas and share additional insights that didn’t make it into this article.

👉 Join the Reclamation Circle

If you’re ready to reclaim your voice, your vision, and your next chapter, I’d love to welcome you into the Reclamation Circle. Registration for this cohort closes soon, and we won’t open the doors again until later this fall.

👉 Work With Me One-on-One

July is my birthday month, and I’m opening a limited number of VIP coaching sessions. If you’re navigating a major transition, seeking greater clarity, or preparing for your next chapter, it would be my honor to walk alongside you. Click here to schedule.

—————-

My friend, remember that your future does not have to be a continuation of your past.

No matter your age or stage of life, there are still possibilities waiting to be discovered by you.

Until next time,

Keep growing.

Keep becoming.

Keep creating a life that is uniquely your own.

And as always,

Dare To Soar Higher® because the best is yet to come.

Blessings!

SharRon

 

Weekly Blessing!

May you have the courage to surround yourself with people who challenge your thinking.

May you have people around you who deepen your understanding.

May you have people who expand your imagination and help you see possibilities beyond your current reality.

May you have people who sharpen your discernment and help you trust what is right and true for you.

May you have people who build bridges, create connections, and open doors to opportunities you could not see on your own.

May you never shrink your life to fit your current circumstances when there is so much life available to you.

May you always remember that you can dare to soar higher because the best is yet to come.

 

Their “Wait” Was Not My “No”

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog. No Comments on Their “Wait” Was Not My “No”

When I entered the fitness profession in the early 1990s, I quickly discovered that I did not fit the image many people had of a fitness professional.

At the time, the industry promoted a very narrow standard of fitness, beauty, and leadership. Unfortunately, I did not fit that standard because I was a Black woman with curves and hips. To most, I didn’t look at all like someone who should be standing at the front of an aerobics class, leading and instructing others.

So, unsurprisingly, I kept hearing the same advice.

“Just wait.”

“Your opportunity will come.”

“Be patient.”

At first, the advice seemed reasonable because there are seasons in life when waiting is wise. Not every opportunity is supposed to happen immediately. Timing matters. Preparation matters. Developing the expertise, experience, and confidence necessary for success matters.

However, as the months passed, I noticed something.

The opportunities were not coming!

In fact, after many meetings, I never received a callback.

At first, I felt discouraged because I knew my rejection was NOT due to a lack of knowledge.  I knew deeply in my heart that I was being ignored because gym owners could not see beyond their assumptions and biases about what a fitness professional should look like.

So instead of focusing on who would hire me, I started asking myself a more important question: Where can I serve?

That question led me into churches, parks, community organizations, and eventually even a beauty salon, where I taught fitness classes and motivated people to believe in themselves and their ability to create healthier lives.

Here is the good news:  Teaching in those spaces led to newspaper coverage, speaking opportunities, community leadership, entrepreneurship, national television appearances, and many other experiences that enriched both my life and my career.

More importantly, finding unconventional spaces to serve others taught me THIS important life lesson …..DON’T WAIT for validation when you know you are called to do something!

So this is what I want you to always remember:  Getting wise counsel is important.

Advice matters.

Mentors matter.

Coaches matter.

Experienced voices matter.

Feedback can help us avoid costly mistakes and unnecessary detours.

However, not all advice is rooted in wisdom. Sometimes people can ONLY offer you opinions based on their limitations, fears, and prejudices. And if you listen, you will not do what you need to do to enjoy a fulfilling life.

So, as you reflect on your own life, I encourage you to think about the times you were told to wait and ask yourself a few questions, like:

Was that advice rooted in wisdom?

Did it help you become more prepared, more capable, or more successful?

Did it feel rooted in someone else’s assumptions, fears, preferences, or inability to see your potential?

Did the wisdom help you win?

More importantly, determine where you are being told to wait today.

And determine if the advice to wait aligns with what you know to be true.

Because there are moments in life when we must respect and heed advice. However, we must always discern whether the advice aligns with what we know to be true in our hearts, minds, and spirits, so we won’t abandon our purpose, calling, and dreams.

That way…. we will never let someone’s advice to wait override what we KNOW !

Blessings!

SharRon

————–

P.S. Let’s Continue the Conversation

👉  Listen to the Podcast
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👉 Share This Article
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👉 Join the Reclamation Circle
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👉 Work With Me One-on-One
A limited number of coaching sessions are available for those seeking clarity, strategy, and support for their next chapter.

 

My Blessing for You This Week

May you have the wisdom to recognize the difference between a necessary pause and an unnecessary delay.

May you have the discernment to distinguish divine timing from human limitation.

May you trust your gifts, honor your calling, and continue moving forward even when others cannot yet see what is possible.

May you learn from wise counsel without surrendering your authority.

And may you always remember that a divine calling will be more powerful than any artificial delay.

The Day I Stopped Pretending I Was Fine

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog, Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on The Day I Stopped Pretending I Was Fine

There is a kind of tired that has nothing to do with sleep.

My elders called it being “bone weary.” And I always thought I understood what they meant.

I did not. Not really. Not until I came home from church one Sunday, walked through the door, and something in me just… gave way.

I took off my clothes, sat down on the edge of my bed, and cried.

Silently.

The kind of tears that have been waiting for a quiet moment when no one is watching.

And when they finally slowed, I told myself the truth.

I was not okay.

Not depressed — I want to name that distinction clearly because it matters. I know what depression feels like. Depression is not a stranger to me. I have navigated its particular kind of darkness before.

This was something different.

Something quieter. Something that had been settling into my bones for months, even as I kept showing up, producing, encouraging, and performing fine.

This was spiritual depletion.  I discuss this topic in this week’s episode of Deciding To Soar: Living Life Your Own Way. Click here to listen.)

Now, I want to pause here — because when I first put those two words together, something in me resisted.

My religious upbringing made me feel guilty even placing those words side by side. As if admitting that my spirit was depleted meant I had somehow failed God. As if I should have been able to pray through it, serve through it, praise through it,  worship through it, and work through it.

But here is what I now know: Naming “spiritual depletion” was not a crisis of faith. It was a courageous act of faith.

Why?

Because spiritual depletion is not the same as burnout.

Burnout is about doing too much….for too many… for too long….without any support, joy, or purpose.

Spiritual depletion is what happens when a woman has been giving from her deepest self — her spirit, her core, her truest identity — for so long, to too many, and in so many directions, that she loses access to herself.

Of course, she is still succeeding according to how society defines success.

She is still functioning.

She is still showing up.

She is still looking good and well-dressed.

She is still leading her team, achieving milestones, and effectively executing strategies.

Yes, she is still building her business, seeing patients, advising her clients, teaching her students, and raising her children.

 But something essential is gone. And she knows it, even though she cannot name it.

It looks like:

  • Going to church out of  obligation instead of spiritual renewal
  • Work becoming mechanical — parts of you present, other parts quietly withdrawn
  • Being physically present but emotionally distant
  • Code-switching, shifting from feeling like a survival strategy into something that feels like slow self-erasure
  • A bone-deep weariness that sleep does not touch
  • Relationships with people who need you but never feed you — emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually
  • A quiet desire to stop. Not to disappear. Just to finally, finally rest, even though you can’t clearly articulate what type of rest and respite you crave or need. 

That Sunday after church, I realized I had run out of places to hide.

Not from other people.

From myself.

And so I had to do the one thing I had been avoiding.

I had to come back to myself.

As uncomfortable as that was — and it was deeply uncomfortable — it was also sacred.

Because that moment marked the beginning of one of the most honest seasons of my life.

If you are reading this and something in you just exhaled…

If something whispered, that sounds like me…

If you have been calling it burnout, or stress, or just being tired — because spiritual depletion felt too big, too tender, too much to admit…

I want you to know: what you are feeling is real.

You are not weak.

You are not ungrateful.

You are not failing.

You are not less accomplished.

You are depleted. And there is a difference.

Here is where I would invite you to begin. Just three things. I call them the 3 N’s.

Name it. Tell yourself the truth without softening it. Without comparing it. Just name where you actually are — honestly, without apology.

Notice it. Look compassionately at where your energy is actually going. Not to fix it overnight. Just to see it clearly. Clarity creates space even before anything changes.

Nourish it. Each day, allow yourself to admit one true thing. Not positive. Not polished. Just real….For example, I am tired. I miss who I used to be. I am still here, and that is enough. Those small truths begin to reconnect you to yourself in ways that performance never could.

What I know for sure: You cannot outrun your own depletion. Eventually, the depletion will sit you down. The only question is whether you sit down on your own terms, or whether life does it for you.

For me, it was a little bit of both that eventually forced me to sit down on the edge of that bed.

And it was the most sacred thing that had happened to me in years.

 I want to leave you with this….

This week, please remember — you matter.

What you are feeling matters.

What you are carrying matters.

And the most holy action you can take right now is to take care of yourself.

Not tomorrow. Not after you finish everything on your list. Not after everyone else is okay.

Now.

So name it. Notice it. Nourish it.

It is time to SOAR.

This Week’s Blessing:

May you have the courage to tell yourself the truth — even when the truth is tender.

May you honor what your spirit has been trying to say.

May you Name what you are carrying, Notice where your energy is going, and Nourish yourself back to wholeness — one true thing at a time.

And may you trust that even here, in this honest and sacred space, you are still becoming.

Blessings,

SharRon 💛

I explore this more on this week’s episode of Deciding to Soar. Listen on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and wherever you get your podcasts.

And join me for more conversations — subscribe to A True Word, my weekly letter. Join here.

I Know What I Carry: Why Owning Your Strengths Changes Everything

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There is a shift happening.

It is not loud. It is not dramatic. But it is real.

I hear it in conversations. I see it in my clients. And if I am honest, I have felt it in my own life. It shows up as a quiet unease—a growing awareness that something is no longer working the way it once did in our jobs, our families, and even in our relationships.

More and more people are recognizing the same pattern:

  • They feel underappreciated and overused
  • They are carrying more responsibility than ever, yet feel less seen and less supported
  • They are contributing at high levels, yet only parts of them are being recognized or utilized
  • They are showing up, adjusting, and accommodating, yet something still feels incomplete or unfulfilled

When you constantly feel this way, it creates a tension—a subtle but persistent reminder that you are giving more than the environment or the relationships around you can fully receive or honor. And if we are honest, it begins to chip away at your spirit. It doesn’t feel good, and it was never meant to.

None of us were meant to beg to be seen, hustle to feel heard, or sell our souls to be successful.

So if you have been feeling this way, pause.

Acknowledge it.
Do not judge it.
Do not dismiss it.

Because that awareness is not weakness; it is information. It is a signal that something within you is ready for greater alignment, greater honesty, and greater ownership.

That is why I created this conversation around “I Know What I Carry.” Click here to listen. Because understanding your strengths is not just helpful—it is transformational. It gives you six powerful forms of awareness that remind you just how capable, how extraordinary, and how equipped you truly are.

Let’s walk through them.

Accuracy: Owning your strengths is not arrogance; it is truth.

Accuracy gives you clarity. It allows you to tell the truth about what you do well without minimizing it or waiting for external validation. When you are clear, your decisions become more grounded, more intentional, and more aligned.

Alignment: Your strengths deserve the right environment.

Alignment gives you direction. It helps you stop scattering your energy across spaces that can only partially receive you and instead place your gifts where they can be fully expressed. Alignment reduces exhaustion and increases impact.

Assurance: Your strength creates internal stability.

Assurance is deeper than confidence. It is not dependent on applause or recognition. It is an internal knowing that steadies you, allowing you to stand in your value even when others do not see it immediately.

Authority: You don’t have to wait to be chosen.

Authority shifts you from waiting to deciding. It reminds you that while others may control access to platforms or positions, they do not control your purpose. You have the right to move, build, and act from what you know you carry.

Agency: Your strengths give you options.

Agency expands your choices. It allows you to decide where your gifts go, how they are used, and what you will no longer tolerate. This is where freedom begins.

Anchoring: Your strengths steady you in uncertain times.

Life will shift. Roles will change. Expectations will evolve. But when you are grounded in your strengths, you are not easily moved. You have something internal to return to—something that stabilizes you no matter what is happening around you.

When you understand and own all of this, everything changes.

You begin to see that you are not stuck.
You are not limited.
You are not required to remain in spaces that diminish you.

You can make a change.
You can make a decision.
You can create something different.

You are not here to exist in fragments. You are here to live, lead, and serve in fullness. And when you remember and activate your strengths, you begin to move differently. You begin to see possibilities where you once saw limitations.

So let me remind you clearly:

You are equipped.
You have everything you need encoded in your DNA.
You lack nothing.
You have what it takes to make the changes in your life that keep you sane, safe, successful, and satisfied.

This Week’s Blessing:

May you stop negotiating what God already named.
May you stand in what you carry without apology.
May you trust your strength—not as arrogance, but as alignment.
May you move with assurance when the world is uncertain.
May you sit in authority without waiting to be chosen.
And may you build a life that reflects not just what you can do… but who you were called to be.

Because you don’t need more permission.

You need more clarity.

And clarity begins the moment you say—

I know what I carry.

I shared more about this in this week’s podcast episode, and I hope it meets you wherever you are. I invite you to listen to the episode here on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and other platforms.

Also, be sure to join my newsletter for more conversations. Join here.

Blessings!

SharRon

Don’t Fall in Love with the “Water” and Forget to Care for the “Well”

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My elders used to say, “Don’t fall so much in love with the ‘water’ that you forget to care for the ‘well’”.

For a long time, I understood that as a simple reminder to be grateful. To say thank you. To not take things for granted. But as I have grown—through my relationships, my responsibilities, and my own seasons of needing and being needed—I have come to understand that this wisdom is asking something much deeper of us.

It is not just asking us to receive with gratitude. It is asking us to live with awareness.

Because the “water” in our lives—the support, the encouragement, the insight, the presence we rely on—does not exist on its own. It comes from somewhere. More precisely, it comes from someone.

The “water” is what we receive. It is the friend who listens when we are overwhelmed, the person who shows up when we do not have the words, the one who offers guidance when we feel uncertain. It is the opportunity that finds us at the right time, the resource that meets a need, the financial support, the introduction, the advice that shifts our thinking. The “water” sustains us, and we all need it.

But the “well” is who made it possible.

The “well” is the person who chose to give. The one who made space, who offered time, who extended care, who poured from their own experience so that we might benefit. The “well” is not automatic. It is intentional. People decide—consciously or unconsciously—to be “wells” in our lives.

And yet, we live in a culture that teaches us to focus almost exclusively on the “water.”

For example, we celebrate outcomes. We highlight access. We reward visibility and results. We are taught how to ask, how to position ourselves, how to receive. But we are not always taught how to honor the person who made it possible. So we become skilled at accessing what we need, while remaining underdeveloped in acknowledging those who provide it.

Over time, this creates relationships that feel uneven. Not always visibly fractured, but quietly strained. Because when we consistently receive without recognizing the source, we begin to treat people as pathways rather than as partners. We value what flows to us more than who it flows from.

This matters now more than ever.

We are living in a time that is complex, demanding, and often overwhelming. Many of us are navigating uncertainty, carrying responsibilities, and leaning on one another in ways that are both visible and unseen. In moments like these, relationships are not optional—they are essential. And if we misunderstand the relationship between the “water” and the “well,” we risk damaging the very connections we depend on.

Part of that misunderstanding comes from our failure to recognize the cost of what people
give.

There is always a cost.

When someone listens, it costs them time.

When someone supports us emotionally, it costs them energy.

When someone offers wisdom, it often comes from something they have endured,
processed, and learned.

When someone shows up consistently, it costs them presence, attention, and sometimes
even parts of themselves they have not yet had the chance to restore.

If we only focus on what we receive and never consider what it required, we unintentionally diminish the value of the relationship.

And that is why we must learn how to care for the “well.”

Caring for the “well” begins with specificity. It is not enough to say, “I appreciate you.” While those words matter, they often lack the depth that true acknowledgment requires. Instead, we must name what was given and why it mattered.

Caring for the “well” also means remaining connected beyond moments of need. To reach out without an agenda. To say, “I was thinking about you today and wanted to check in.”

Reciprocity is essential. Even if it does not take the same form, we are still responsible for contributing to the relationship.

Finally, caring for the “well” requires us to learn how others “receive” appreciation and make our gratitude just as specific as our requests.

Reminder: And then, there are those of us who are the “well.”

The ones people call.
The ones people lean on.
The ones who show up—again and again.

Being the “well” is a gift. It is a calling. It is sacred work.

But it is not permission to be depleted.

If you are the “well,” you must also take responsibility for your sustainability.

As you move through your relationships, remember:

The “water” is what you receive.
The “well” is who made it possible.

And we need them both.

May you recognize the “wells” in your life and honor them with intention and truth.

I shared more about this in this week’s podcast episode, and I hope it meets you wherever you are. I invite you to listen to the episode here on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and other platforms.

Blessings!
SharRon

Your Reputation Is More Important Than Revenge

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Soar Higher Blog. No Comments on Your Reputation Is More Important Than Revenge

Many years ago, my elders shared a piece of wisdom with me that I didn’t fully understand at the time.

They said simply, “Your reputation is more important than revenge.”

Like many lessons that come from elders, the words sounded wise but distant. They felt like something meant for someone else’s life—someone else’s circumstances. At the time, I had no idea that life would eventually place me in situations where those words would become not just meaningful, but necessary.

And that’s exactly what happened!

About 15 years ago, I experienced a betrayal that forced me to confront the depth of that wisdom. Someone I trusted deeply began spreading falsehoods about me. These were not small misunderstandings or careless remarks. The statements were damaging and deliberate, and they reached into areas of my life that mattered deeply—my work, my reputation, my family, and the trust I had built with others over many years.

The experience was painful in ways that are difficult to describe. It affected my business. It affected my health. It shook my confidence and forced me to question whether the truth about who I KNEW I was would be strong enough to withstand the vitriol of someone’s lies.

If you have ever had someone gossip about you, misrepresent your character, or distort the work you have done, then you understand how destabilizing that experience can be. In moments like that, the instinct to retaliate can be very strong. We want to correct the record. We want people to see the truth. Sometimes we even want the person who hurt us to feel the same pain they caused us.

Yet over time, I learned something that completely changed how I respond to betrayal, public attacks, and misrepresentation.

I learned that …. Protecting your reputation requires strategy, not reaction.

That realization eventually led me to develop what I call The Five A’s of Protecting Your Reputation. This framework has helped me move through many painful experiences with greater clarity, dignity, and intention. I share more about the subject on the Deciding To Soar Podcast: Living Life Your Own Way.  (Click to listen)

Below is the process I now use whenever I find myself facing situations where my reputation, work, or character may be at risk.

Step 1: Acknowledge the Wound

The first step is honesty.

When someone betrays you, spreads misinformation about you, or misrepresents your work, the pain can be very real. Many people try to skip over this step by pretending they are unaffected. They tell themselves they need to “be strong” or “move on.”

But healing cannot begin until we acknowledge what actually happened.

Suppressing pain does not make it disappear. Instead, it often resurfaces later, distorting our judgment and affecting our emotional well-being.

Acknowledging the wound might look like journaling about the situation, talking with a trusted friend, or simply admitting to yourself that what happened was painful, embarrassing, disruptive, or just low-down.

Naming the hurt is not weakness. It is clarity.

Reflection Question: Where might you be minimizing a wound that deserves to be acknowledged?

Step 2: Assess the Impact
Once you have acknowledged the emotional reality of the situation, the next step is to assess the impact.

What actually happened?

Did someone misrepresent your work? Did someone spread misinformation about you? Did someone attempt to damage your credibility or reputation? Did someone steal sensitive or divulge sensitive data?

It is important to examine the situation carefully before responding. Emotional pain can sometimes magnify our perception of events, but clarity helps us move from reaction to strategy.

Assessment also allows us to understand the difference between perceived harm and actual consequences.

This step helps ensure that our response is thoughtful rather than impulsive.

Reflection Question: Am I responding to the facts of the situation, or to the emotional shock of the moment?

Step 3: Arrange Your Response

This is the moment when wisdom begins to shape action.

Once you understand what has happened and how it may affect you, the next step is to arrange your response.

And here is something many people overlook: sometimes the most powerful response is silence.

Not every situation requires immediate confrontation. Sometimes, allowing time to pass reveals more truth than reacting quickly ever could.

At this stage, it is helpful to ask a critical question: Will my response escalate the conflict, or elevate my integrity?

Escalation often happens when we react from a place of anger or humiliation. However, elevation happens when we respond in ways that protect our dignity, affirm our values, and position us favorably for our future.

Arranging your response may involve seeking counsel from mentors, trusted advisors, or people who understand the broader context of the situation.

Remember, the goal is not simply to defend yourself in the moment. The goal is to protect your long-term reputation and minimize the impact on your career, family, and spirit.

Reflection Question: Am I choosing escalation or elevation?

Step 4: Activate the Plan

Once you have arranged a thoughtful response, the next step is activation.

Activation means implementing your plan with intention, courage, precision, and clarity.

For some people, activation may involve addressing misinformation directly and correcting the record. In other situations, activation may involve documenting the truth, strengthening professional boundaries, securing legal representation, or allowing your body of work to speak for itself.

Activation is NOT about proving someone wrong. It is about standing firmly in what you know to be true about yourself and the situation.

And, activation should also include an important element that many people overlook: healing. Why? When betrayal affects your emotional well-being, ignoring that pain can lead to decisions that compromise your peace or integrity.

My friend, healing may involve reflection, spiritual grounding, counseling, or reconnecting with supportive community.

Remember, spiritual and emotional healing is not separate from your strategy. It is part of the strategy.

Reflection Question: What action would allow me to stand in my integrity without sacrificing my peace?

Step 5: Continue Healing and Stay Open

The final step may be the most challenging.

When someone harms you, your natural instinct may be to protect yourself by becoming guarded or withdrawn because betrayal can make us suspicious of others and hesitant to trust again.

Yet closing ourselves off from possibility creates another form of loss.

So, even though it’s difficult, try to stay open. Just to be clear: Remaining open does not mean ignoring what happened. Instead, it means refusing to allow someone else’s behavior to define your future or dictate how you move in the world.

Also, staying open allows you to maintain your confidence, your creativity, and your willingness to engage with new opportunities and relationships. That’s key!

More importantly, staying open is a powerful way of reclaiming your identity and your voice.

Reflection Question: What would it look like for you to remain open while staying anchored in your truth?

 

Looking back now, I realize that the wisdom my elders shared all those years ago carried far more depth than I understood at the time. And, I am so glad I listened with my heart, and not just with my ears.

Remember…..

Revenge is fleeting. It may feel satisfying in the moment, but its effects rarely last and can ruin your life.

Reputation, however, is built slowly over time. It is formed through integrity, consistency, and character repeated across many seasons of life. And when your reputation is rooted in those qualities, it will speak for you in places where you may never be able to speak for yourself.

That is why the lesson still holds true today.

Yes, your reputation is more important than revenge.

Not because revenge is impossible, but because YOUR reputation—when built on integrity—has the power to stand the test of time.

Please listen to the podcast and subscribe to my YouTube channel while you are there. I would really appreciate your support. Click here.

Blessings,

SharRon

You Don’t Need To Do More Work. You Need To Be Witnessed.

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog, Uncategorized. No Comments on You Don’t Need To Do More Work. You Need To Be Witnessed.

One of the most important lessons my elders taught me in my early twenties was this:

You don’t need to do more work. You need to be witnessed.

They were not discouraging excellence or effort.

They were challenging a dangerous assumption that performance and labor alone guarantee elevation.

They understood something many of us eventually learn the hard way: that some people will be expected to carry more, prove longer, and work harder—even when they are already doing excellent work. They knew that exemplary performance alone does not always lead to protection, recognition, or advancement.

That’s why they said, you need a witness.

The word ‘witnessing’ is one we often hear in religious and spiritual spaces. At its core, it means to see truth and to testify to it. Which means that a witness is not a casual spectator or a passive observer. It is someone who names what they see and allows that truth to shape trust, inspire growth, and expand potential.

This is why witnessing matters just as much in workplaces and organizations as it does in spiritual settings.

And to be clear: witnessing is more than feedback. Feedback evaluates performance. Witnessing affirms personhood.

Witnessing says, I see you. I see what you bring. I see who you are becoming—and I’m willing to name it.

If you pause and think about your own career, you likely remember moments when you felt witnessed.

  • Moments when you were invited to the table and trusted to speak.
  • When your growth was not only celebrated but compensated.
  • When people appreciated your work and your wisdom.
  • When you felt visible and valued.

Feeling seen and appreciated had a real impact on your life. It nourished your soul. It built your confidence. It freed you to contribute at the highest level—not out of fear or over-functioning, but out of trust and belonging.

And most of us also remember the times when we were not witnessed.

  • The seasons when we were told that we were reliable, but never considered ready.
  • When we were asked to carry the load, but not given the opportunity to lead.
  • When we were expected to produce, but never promoted.
  • When you had to deliver big results with few resources.
  • When our work was used, but we were never credited.

Those experiences didn’t just stall our careers. They left hurtful marks on our spirits. And over time, feeling unseen or undervalued depleted our energy, eroded our trust, and lowered our level of engagement—not because we lacked resilience, but because we felt extracted from rather than affirmed and invested in.

What I know for sure is this: witnessing matters especially now.

Why?

Many of us are navigating seasons of transition, uncertainty, and reinvention. And while witnessing may not directly address the emotions that come with change, it does something just as important: it reminds you who you are.

It reaffirms strengths that may have been overshadowed by loss, disruption, or disappointment.

 It stabilizes your identity when everything around you feels unstable.

And, it anchors you in truth while you discern your next step.

That’s why witnessing is not a luxury or a soft leadership concept. It is a difference maker. It is a leadership imperative. It is an indicator of high emotional intelligence.

After decades of coaching high-performing, high-values, and high-impact people, what I know for sure is this: when people feel honored—not just evaluated—they expand their capacity to perform. And just as importantly, they expand their capacity to honor themselves and others.

When that happens, trust deepens. Cultures shift. Problems are solved. Solutions are created. And leadership becomes more humane, more sustainable, and more whole.

As you sit with this reflection, consider these questions.

  • Where in your work have you felt most seen—and why?
  • Where have you felt productive, but invisible?
  • How do you typically respond when you are not witnessed?
  • And when you are witnessed, do you name how empowering that experience is?

You might also consider where witnessing could change something beyond work. Where in your personal life could being seen—or offering that seeing to someone else—restore trust or connection? What parts of you long to be named, acknowledged, or developed more fully?

And if you are spiritually inclined, you might gently ask: In what ways do I experience—or long to experience—being witnessed by my Creator? What helps me recognize that kind of seeing and validation?

If this reflection resonates, I invite you to listen to this week’s Deciding To Soar: Living Life Your Own Way podcast episode, where I explore the five dimensions of witnessing—what they look like, why they matter, and how they shape confidence, leadership, and trust. You can listen on YouTube, Apple, or other platforms.

Over the coming weeks, I’ll continue exploring witnessing across different areas of life—because in seasons of uncertainty, disruption, and global change, witnessing matters now more than ever.

If you have questions about witnessing—at work, in leadership, in relationships, or in your own healing—I welcome them. I’ll weave those questions into future writing, conversations, and workshops.

My Blessing For You: May you be seen for who you are, not just for what you produce.
May your work be witnessed, your gifts named, and your humanity honored.
And may you have the courage to witness others with the same care.

I SEE YOU!

SharRon

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Holy Rebellion: When Restlessness Becomes Revelation

Written by SharRon Jamison on . Posted in Blog. No Comments on Holy Rebellion: When Restlessness Becomes Revelation

In my previous podcast episode and blog, I discussed ruptures — those sacred breakings that occur when the soul can no longer carry what the ego insists on keeping.  And talking about ruptures really resonated, as I received many responses from people around the world.

First…..THANK YOU! Thank you to those who shared their reflections, stories, and honest questions with me. Your words reminded me that this work of healing, reckoning, and rising is not mine alone; it’s ours. And it is an honor to be on this life-enriching, truth-telling journey with you.

Many of the inquiries I received revolved around these questions:  “What leads to the rupture? How do I know if I am experiencing ruptures? And how to move through ruptures without disrupting my entire life?”

This blog is my attempt to answer those questions as I understand them, in this season of my own growth and development. Even after 60 years, I continue to learn, grow, and challenge my own assumptions as I navigate major life transitions. Still, I will try to share what I am learning in my own life and what I experience from working with game changers, paradigm shifters, and visionaries like you.

Let’s begin….

As I shared on the podcast and blog, ruptures rarely happen overnight. There are exceptions, for example, when a person unexpectedly experiences tragedy, receives a life-changing diagnosis, or suffers a painful loss.  However, most ruptures build quietly, often beneath the surface, until silence becomes too heavy to hold or discomfort becomes too distressing to bear.

In some ways, ruptures are the soul’s way of saying, “Something sacred must shift — or simply put, something needs to move or change.”

That desire to move or shift often begins with what I call holy restlessness, a divine unease that refuses to let us stay in places we have outgrown or in areas that can’t honor our wholeness.

If you haven’t yet listened to or read the earlier message, “Your ‘Enough’ Is Holy,” I encourage you to do so. It will help you see how divine disruption clears the path for divine order. (Link)

So, let’s discuss restlessness ….

Restlessness is something we all experience. All of us!

We feel it when our jobs start draining us instead of developing us.

We notice it when our relationships stagnate or demand that we abandon crucial aspects of our humanity to maintain connection and commitment.

We sense it when our dreams start whispering again, reminding us that we are not doing what we were created to do.

We notice it when doubt drowns hope, anger derails advancement, and lies have more leverage than the truth.

We feel it in our communities when compassion gives way to competition, complicity, and corruption.

We see it in our places of worship and our schools, in our politics and our parenting, when fear is used to drive decisions.

We see it in the widening gaps between racial groups, in the silence that replaces courage, and in the harsh words hurled at those who dare to be different.

We see it! We sense it

Why?

Because…. restlessness emerges when the soul signals that expansion is overdue and your growth can no longer fit within your current container, relationship, philosophy, faith, or job.

And even though everyone experiences restlessness, everyone feels this holy restlessness differently. Some sense in their bodies. Others feel in their thinking. The experience of holy restlessness is as unique as your fingerprints.

For me, I experience holy restlessness as a quiet stirring in my soul.

However, to people who know me well, they say that holy restlessness in me looks like irritation, frustration, or even short-temperedness.  They say, “SharRon is complaining again, or she is so touchy.”  I don’t always immediately agree with them, but honestly,  they’re usually right.

For example, when I’m being called into something new, life starts to feel tight, heavy, and suffocating. I cry more. I isolate. I stop returning calls. I read more books. I get quiet as I try to process the changes that I can’t see, but sense. It’s hard to put language to the feeling, but it feels as if my spirit is searching for a new path, my body is wrestling with direction, and my heart is bracing for transformation. It is a disorienting feeling because even when my mind hasn’t yet caught up, my soul knows that something is changing, that the rupture has begun.

This year, I’ve felt those feelings in every area of my life. And while it’s been uncomfortable, I’ve learned that restlessness is not something to fear. It’s something to honor.

As I’ve wrestled with my own holy restlessness, I began to see a rhythm emerging — a sacred pattern that helps people move from discomfort to discovery, from friction to freedom, and from confusion to clarity.

I call it the 5 R’s of Holy Rebellion.

These are not rules to follow or rigid steps to master. They’re spiritual rhythms, which are also divine invitations to wake up, break free, and rebuild. Each step reveals something about how we grow, heal, and reclaim ourselves. Each step also asks us to pause, to feel, and to follow the truth wherever it leads. Each step requires you to tell yourself the truth.

As you read through the steps or rhythms, notice which stage feels most familiar to you. That’s usually where your soul is doing its deepest work.

1. Restlessness – The Divine Disturbance
Restlessness is the first knock on the door of your destiny.

It’s the shaking that causes the waking. It’s the stirring and rumble that announces, “You’ve stayed here long enough.”

It’s what wakes you up from the slumber of routine or the invisible cage of the status quo.

It gathers your lessons, your losses, your receipts, and your resilience, whispering: “There’s more in you — but you can’t carry it, develop it, or experience it here.”

Restlessness is holy because it refuses to let you confuse safety with purpose or societal goals with a Spiritual call.

2. Reckoning – The Sacred Confrontation
Reckoning arrives when truth sits you down and says, “We need to talk.”

It’s when the fog clears and you can no longer hide behind busyness or blame. You start facing what you’ve been pretending not to see — your compromises, your patterns, your silence.

Reckoning is rarely gentle, but it is always just. It’s not here to shame you; it’s here to sharpen you. It’s the moment your excuses expire and your honesty begins.

Remember: Reckoning doesn’t come to ruin you; it comes to realign you.

3. Rupture – The Necessary Breaking
Rupture happens when you can’t go back to pretending. It’s not chaos; it’s clarity. It’s the divine demolition that clears space for truth.

Rupture doesn’t destroy you; it delivers you.

It’s the holy unraveling that makes room for what’s real. It’s the Spirit saying, “Let go so I can rebuild.”

Rupture is not rebellion against God; it’s rebellion against what keeps you from God.

If this is your season of rupture, be gentle with yourself. You’re being re-formed, not ruined.

4. Repair & Rebuild – The Holy Reordering

After the breaking comes the building.

Repair is tender work — a mix of humility, patience, and hope. It’s when you pick through the debris of what was and decide what deserves to remain.

This is where wisdom meets work, where faith meets follow-through. You rebuild not from fear, but from freedom. You reorder your life around integrity and alignment — not image or approval.

Repair is where the sacred becomes sustainable.

5. Rest – The Sacred Integration
Rest is not retreat; it’s restoration.

It’s where everything you’ve endured begins to make sense. It’s the breath between battles and the silence after the storm.

Rest teaches you that rebellion was never about destruction; it was always about divine reordering. It’s the pause that integrates your healing, your lessons, and your liberation.

Rest is how rebellion becomes regeneration, rather than exhaustion.

Again….

None of the stages or steps is an isolated moment. They are sacred movements — a rhythm of rebirth that repeats as life calls you higher. So, each time you move through it, you shed another layer of limitation and gain another layer of liberation.

Now that you’ve walked through these five rhythms with me, I invite you to look inward.

Ask yourself: Where do I find myself in this sacred cycle? Am I in the restlessness of awakening, the reckoning of truth-telling, the rupture of release, the repair of rebuilding, or the rest of renewal?

My friend, listen to your life.

Pay attention to what’s shaking, stirring, or stretching you because those feelings are not accidents. They’re invitations and holy nudges calling you to evolve.

Please repeat after me: Holy Restlessness is not a punishment; it’s my permission. It’s grace, disguised as discomfort, calling me toward my next becoming.

Here’s My Blessing To YOU: 

May your restlessness become revelation.
May your reckoning become release.
May your rupture lead to repair.
And may your rest remind you that divine rebellion is not defiance; it’s devotion to your truth.

If this message resonated with you, I encourage you to revisit the episode “Holy Rebellion: When Restlessness Becomes Revelation” on Apple Podcast or Youtube. You may hear it differently now that your heart has shifted.

And as always, remember:
You were never created to live stuck, silenced, or small.
You were created to SOAR— higher, wiser, freer, and whole.

Blessings,

SharRon