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Tag: truth-seeker

Do You See Us? The Healing Power of Witnessing Black Women

Last week, I began a series on the power of witnessing.

Based on the feedback I received, it resonated deeply. Many of you shared that it named something you’ve been feeling—at work, in leadership, and during seasons of transition and uncertainty—something you hadn’t quite had language for.

So today, I want to continue that conversation, with the hope of supporting all of us in our efforts to build more loving, affirming, and supportive communities.

And before I go any further, I want to again define witnessing for anyone who may be joining us for the first time.

Witnessing is not simply noticing someone’s presence.

To witness is to:

  • see truth clearly
  • and testify to it out loud

When you witness someone, you are saying:

I see what you can do, and I value who you are.
I recognize your humanity, even if the world does not.
I honor your contribution, even if it goes unrewarded.
I remember you, even when history or leadership tries to forget you.

Remeber, witnessing isn’t about applause. It’s not a symbolic celebration or surface-level praise.

Witnessing is about seeing people and their realities clearly—and responding with care.

As we enter Black History Month—a time to honor the lives, legacies, and contributions of Black people—I want to pause and speak with intention, especially to Black women, as we continue the conversation I began last week.

Although many of us are navigating job loss and career uncertainty, research consistently confirms that Black women are experiencing higher rates of job loss, greater financial instability, and more frequent career transitions than any other demographic group.

Unfortunately, I have seen this play out in boardrooms, ministries, and community spaces alike, where Black women continue to execute strategies, solve problems, and steady institutions even as their own job security and financial stability are threatened.

In moments like this, witnessing is not optional. It is vital to nourish the soul and support a person’s dignity.

And as we all endeavor to witness each other in confidence-building and dignity-affirming ways, I want to share five specific ways we can witness Black women—ways that protect humanity, interrupt erasure, and support healing.


1. Witness Their Strengths (Talent, Skills, and Expertise)

When we talk about witnessing the strength of Black women, we are not only talking about emotional endurance. We are also talking about talent, expertise, insight, wisdom,  creativity, and skill.

Witnessing here means naming what Black women do well—how they think, lead, solve problems, create, and elevate both the work and the people around them.

Why this matters:
When talent and expertise are shared without care, acknowledgment, or appreciation, it can feel like exploitation. Over time, that exploitation can feel like extraction and usury.

Also, being constantly relied upon for what we do well—without being rewarded—undermines confidence, squashes potential, and discourages continued contribution. It breeds resentment, leads to exhaustion, and discourages participation.

What witnessing strengths can sound like:

“I see how talented you are in this situation.”
“You are an effective writer and leader, and your creativity elevates this work.”
“Your expertise is shaping the outcome in meaningful ways, and I want to name that.”


2. Witness Their Success

Black women continue to achieve success (based on their own definitions and own terms)  despite systemic barriers, unequal access, and constant scrutiny. Yet that success is often minimized, delayed, denied, erased, or credited elsewhere.

Witnessing success means naming achievement clearly, without qualification or minimization. It means acknowledging that Black women have achieved, overcome obstacles, and made sacrifices to accomplish their goals.

It is also a recognition that their success often came at a high emotional, physical, and spiritual cost.

Why this matters:
Over time, failure to witness success teaches society to discount, disrespect, and deny the contributions, inventions, and impact of Black women. It also teaches Black women to shrink instead of shine and to minimize the ways they transform the world.

What witnessing success can sound like:

“Your success is not accidental. It reflects your leadership, skill, and persistence.”
“You are a difference maker, a game changer, and a trailblazer. What you have accomplished on your own terms serves as a model for women coming behind you.”
“I appreciate you and I am deeply inspired by the sacrifices you made and the business you created to support young people.”


3. Witness Their Struggle

Black women are frequently expected to perform without pause, to handle crisis without acknowledgment, and to absorb emotional, spiritual, and relational strain without relief.

What is often unnamed is this: the ability to navigate chaos, complexity, and crisis comes at a cost.

Managing complexity, navigating chaos, and juggling mutiple responsibilities takes an emotional, spiritual, and physical toll on the body, mind, and soul. And these tolls frequently go unnoticed and unnamed until they manifest as exhaustion, illness, or disengagement.

Why this matters:
Unwitnessed struggle leads to burnout—not because of a lack of resilience, but because of prolonged invisibility, lack of support, lack of protection, and unmet care.

What witnessing can sound like:

“I see how much this has required of you.”
“What you’re carrying has weight.”
“Even though it looks easy,  I know that it is hard and feels heavy.”


4. Witness Their Sadness

Sadness is often overlooked because strength is expected. That expectation is reinforced by historical narratives that normalize Black pain and mythicize Black endurance. Both do Black women a profound disservice.

There is also shame attached to sadness, grief, and depression. In some cultures, vulnerability and transparency are even misread or misunderstood as weakness, which further increases feelings of shame and isolation.

Why this matters:
Sadness that goes unseen turns into sickness. And sickness eventually erodes well-being, wellness, and wholeness.

What witnessing can sound like:

“You don’t have to be strong right now.”
“Your feelings are real, and they matter.”
“The situation is heavy and draining.  You are not flawed for feeling it.”


5. Witness Their Shifts

Witnessing shifts means affirming that change is allowed and welcomed.

It means understanding that growth should be supported—not punished or penalized.

The truth is: emotional/spiritual healing, establishing boundaries, and making new choices will disrupt family dynamics, alter relationships, and change access to people who demand older versions of ourselves. In fact, making self-enriching and self-affirming decisions can feel threatening to people who benefited from us deprioritizing our needs, de-centering our wants, and denying our true identities.

Why this matters:
Shifts without affirmation can feel destabilizing rather than liberating. People need to know they are permitted, encouraged, and celebrated as they evolve.  Our transformation should be honored. Our growth should never cost us respect, belonging, or safety.

What witnessing can sound like:

“I see how you are changing, and I honor the courage it takes to choose yourself.”
“I see how you are growing—and your growth inspires me to grow too.”
“I see how you move differently now, and by watching you, I’m learning how to honor myself more.”


This week, I released a podcast episode titled: “Do You See Us? The Healing Power of Witnessing Black Women.”

In it, I explore these five ways of witnessing more deeply—why they matter, how they heal, and how they protect dignity and interrupt erasure. You can listen on Apple, YouTube, or your platform of choice.

I invite you to listen. I invite you to reflect.  Most of all, I invite you—especially during Black History Month—to seek out opportunities to witness Black women and to allow yourself to be witnessed by people who truly value you.

Remember, Black women do not need to be fixed. They need to be WITNESSED! They need to be protected, appreciated, and affirmed.

This week, ask yourself:

  • Who is a Black woman in my life whose humanity I MUST witness more fully—starting today?
  • What might I, as a Black woman—or as a loving human—do to witness myself more fully?
  • How can I witness the unique realities of others in more life-enriching, soul-nourishing ways?

*If this message resonates and you find yourself longing to be seen, affirmed, and held in a thoughtful space, I want to extend a personal invitation.

In March, I’ll be offering a small-group witnessing experience—a guided, intimate space designed for reflection, truth-telling, and soul-centered support.

  • The group will include up to five women.

  • I also have two openings for one-on-one work for those who desire more personalized support.

If you’re interested in joining the group or learning more about working with me individually, please email me directly for details. I would be honored to walk with you during this season.

Sending you blessings as I witness you,
SharRon

What My Elders Taught Me About Work and Worth: How A Fork Almost Cost Me My Future

Over 40 years ago, early in my career, I found myself sitting at a formal dinner table in a professional setting that felt far beyond anything I had ever experienced.

The table was set with more forks, spoons, and glasses than I knew how to navigate. The setting was so unfamiliar that I questioned whether I was worthy of having a seat at the table. The truth is, the extravagant place setting made me feel out of my league, and I feared that one small mistake would confirm others’ belief that I did not belong at that table, in the company, or in the industry.

And my fears had nothing to do with my performance. I knew I had the experience, education, wisdom, and expertise to succeed. What unsettled me were the unspoken rules of the room—the customs no one explains—and the fear of making a common mistake or a CLIM, a career-limiting move.

Because when you are the “first or the only”, making any mistake feels scary. Knowing that your missteps will not only influence your own opportunities but also unfairly impact the perceptions and future possibilities of others who look like you makes even ordinary moments feel heavy and risky.

Because my confidence was waning, I knew I needed help. I didn’t need correction or criticism; I needed care.

That care came from elders in my church—people who never had the opportunity to sit at corporate tables themselves, yet possessed the knowledge I deeply needed.

Without my knowing, they set up an entire formal table setting in the back of the church and patiently walked me through the different utensils. They taught me what to use, when to use it, and how to move through meals with confidence. Their love and concern not only prepared me; it strengthened my confidence and reminded me that I was capable of navigating unfamiliar settings with grace.

That one small act—helping me feel comfortable at the table—became a life-changing moment in my career and encouraged me to enter new rooms and accept new challenges. Most of all, it convinced me that I belonged.

As I reflect on my career journey, I’m reminded that it was often my elders who quietly equipped me for the rooms I was called to enter. Unfortunately, after we earn degrees or gain some social status, we too often overlook those who have helped us the most because we assume they have little to offer.

As you reflect on your career –

1) Who helped you feel ready when you were not sure you belonged?

2) Who provided the wisdom you needed so that work wouldn’t undermine your feelings of worth?

3) Who might be waiting for you to show up for them in a life-changing way?

Our elders teach us so much about success, and I am so grateful that those lessons continue to ground us today.

My prayer for you: May you recognize the love that shaped you, honor those who prepared you, share the lessons they gave you, and extend that same care to those you meet along the way.

Blessings!

SharRon

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Trust Your Wings, Not The Branch

Trust your wings, not the branch.

My spiritual mothers taught me that proverb when I was young. At the time, it felt wise. Now, it feels necessary. Because in 2026, many people are confronting a truth we’ve long avoided: the branches we relied on are not as steady as we once believed.

When my spiritual mothers talked about branches, they meant the external structures we’ve been taught to trust—jobs, titles, salaries, positions, policies, corporate systems, status, even the professional connections we’ve built over time. These were the things  – the branches – we were encouraged to lean on and hold tightly, because throughout our lives we were conditioned to believe they would provide stability, security, protection, identity, and meaning. And because those beliefs run deep, most of us don’t question them until the ground beneath us begins to shift and shake.

And for many, that shift and shaking is already underway.

As a minister, I witness the toll of these unexpected shifts; I see the spiritual fatigue up close. On Sundays, I see professionals at the altar who are mentally, emotionally, and spiritually depleted. Their exhaustion isn’t just from completing tasks, but from trying to survive environments that demand constant proving of their worth, managing competing expectations, and sometimes compromising their values just to stay afloat. I witness the toll on their souls, even as they try to hide the sorrow in their eyes and minimize the strain in their bodies. I also sense the tension of feeling grateful to have a job while being overwhelmed by the weight of doing it. It is a heavy, complicated emotional terrain to navigate.

In those vulnerable moments, I am reminded of something my spiritual mothers understood long ago: the branches we were conditioned to trust were never meant to hold us, keep us safe, or sustain us. What actually carries us are our wings.

Our wings are internal. They are the strengths, gifts, abilities, and talents we were born with and the capacities we’ve cultivated along the way. They live in our histories, our personal stories, and the legacies we carry. They show up as resilience, intuition, ancestral wisdom, creativity, curiosity, emotional intelligence, discernment, adaptability, courage, and faith. They act as an inner compass that helps us shed shame when we make mistakes, remember that disruption is not denial, walk through fear while still holding on to faith, and maintain our dignity even when we are attacked. These wings are already within us, often unnamed and uncelebrated, yet they are the very qualities that keep us moving, becoming, building, and blooming—especially when external branches break.

So as this year comes to a close, I invite you to pause and take inventory of your wings. Identify them. Name what you carry and what has carried you, trusting that what sustained you yesterday will guide you now and support you tomorrow.

Remember—you are not your job. You are not your title, your environment, or your position in an organizational chart. You are not confined by systems, structures, stereotypes, policies, or other people’s perceptions. These are branches, and they will eventually bend and break.

You have WINGS. You are lifted, guided, and fortified by them. Your wings are steady, sacred, swift, and strong. And no matter what shifts around you or shakes beneath you, they can carry you toward new opportunities, soul-nourishing places, and dignity-affirming communities.

Here are 10 ways to TRUST YOUR WINGS:

  • Take inventory of your gifts, skills, and strengths—both innate and developed.

  • Name what has carried you through past transitions instead of dismissing it as “just survival.”

  • Pay attention to your intuition—it’s information, not imagination.

  • Separate your worth from your role; your value existed before the title.

  • Notice patterns of resilience—where you adapted, rebuilt, or rose again.

  • Trust the lessons learned in difficult environments; they refined your wings.

  • Stop waiting for external validation to believe what you already know about yourself.

  • Honor your discernment—the ability to read the room and protect your spirit is a strength.

  • Release the need to prove your worth constantly; your wings don’t require permission to fly.

  • Choose alignment over attachment—to people, positions, or systems that no longer fit.


A Closing Benediction

May you trust the wisdom within you more than the structures around you.
May you remember that your value is never dependent on a title, a system, or someone else’s approval.
May you reclaim the strength, creativity, and discernment that carried you yesterday, trusting they will guide you tomorrow.
May you rise with courage when the ground beneath you feels uncertain and risky.
May you fly toward people, places, and possibilities that honor who you are and who you are becoming.
And may you always remember that you were created with wings.

Blessings!

SharRon

September Is the Month Of Completion

Happy September!

It’s the 9th month, and the number 9 symbolizes completion. For me, that’s exciting because it reminds me that I have fulfilled an important stage in my life and that I am ready for something new.

But even though embarking on something new sounds exciting, it can also feel daunting, especially when you are not accustomed to reflecting on your own needs, dreams, and mission.

So, how do you start something new?

First, by being honest with yourself about the quality of your life and discerning if its current structure serves your greatest good… YOUR truth.

Second, by accepting that your truth may have changed because you have grown from an experience, awakened to a new revelation, or healed from an old wound.

Third, by accepting that your new truth may be controversial, confrontational, and contradictory to the status quo. Yes, your new truth may ruffle a few feathers.

Finally, by accepting that your new truth requires new choices and actions because it’s challenging to make life-expanding moves with an old mindset.

So, if you are ready to embark on something new – something bigger, better, and bolder – consider these four critical pillars. And if you need any more motivation to launch out into something new, consider the following benefits:

Your truth will ensure that you stay well, stay whole, and feel worthy of everything you desire and deserve.

Your truth will safeguard you from succumbing to societal narratives, political lies, generational trauma, or gender norms that will stunt your growth or steal your joy.

Your truth will keep you aligned with your heart, help you stay attuned to your inner compass, and develop you toward the highest version of yourself.

Your truth will ensure that you don’t downplay your gifts or use your strengths in self-sabotaging ways.

Most of all, your truth will soften you so you feel safe, seen, and “surrendered” to your higher calling without constant compromise, unproductive comparison, and undue labor.

Essentially, your truth will anchor and prevent you from jeopardizing your dreams, which so many of us do when we prioritize the needs of others over our own.

As a coach and sojourner, I am exploring and considering some critical questions to help me discover and reclaim MORE of my truth. In this season of my life, I want to deeply connect with my TRUTH to expand my capacity to stay open to possibility, follow my inner compass, and welcome divine connections. Maybe these questions will support you if you are also in a season of self-discovery and self-activation.

DareTo Soar Higher Questions:

  • Where in my life am I pretending to be something I am not?
  • Where am I erasing or diluting myself to fit into spaces, and why?
  • What lights me up and lightens my load?
  • What tickles my fancy and makes me feel free?
  • What increases my belief in myself and in a greater power?
  • How can I become more sovereign and less swayed by the opinions, triggers, and expectations of others?
  • What’s the unadulterated truth about who I am and what I want?
  • Where do I need to give myself more permission to explore and execute?
  • Why do I conform and comply with practices or beliefs that don’t align with my divine path?
  • Where am I giving unappreciated labor and love, and why?
  • Where am I forfeiting my integrity, dignity, and mental health?

How do I know if I am being called to do something if I don’t have experience doing it?

Great questions, right?

I know that following your truth will activate you and help you contribute something magical to the world. And the best news is when you follow your truth, you will feel less burdened and obligated to make others happy, and that’s freedom.

So, do yourself a favor. Ask yourself questions, nurture your needs, own your power, pursue your ambition, speak with integrity, and rest your body.  Let your truth bring you the fulfillment you crave and the freedom you deeply desire. Because as all know, the TRUTH will set you free.

Blessings!