Tag: diversity and equity

IGNORE the Naysayers!

If you want to pursue your destiny, one skill that you must develop and strengthen is the skill of IGNORING the naysayers.

 

Yes, ignoring the comments and opinions of people who don’t care about you, your gift, or your life’s calling is a critical skill!

 

Just for the record, ignoring people does not mean that you are rude or arrogant. Ignoring people means you are focused, disciplined, and committed to being the highest version of yourself.

 

It means that you are dedicated to executing your vision with excellence, greatness, and integrity.

 

My friend, let’s be honest. You already wrestle with your own inner demons and insecurities. You are constantly challenging oppressive narratives that undermine your confidence and feelings of worthiness.  So why invite more demons into your space and spirit by listening to people who don’t care about you, who don’t share your values, and who don’t have their own dreams.

 

Goal: Develop your ability to IGNORE statements that keep you stuck, scared, silent, sidetracked, shipwrecked, shallow, stale, sick, and salty.

 

Trust me; your ability to IGNORE people and their negative comments will serve and support you well as you pursue your dreams.

 

If you want more encouragement to ignore the naysayers, stay tuned. “You Can Depend On You” will launch soon.

 

Make sure you join my mailing list to learn more. Click here.

 

Blessings,

 

SharRon!

Your Life Will Teach You Where To Go!

As a child, my elders told me that if you pay attention to your life, it will teach you what you need to know, where you need to grow, and where you need to go.

I never really thought much about that lesson, but over this last year, life has taught me many lessons about what I should be and should not be doing. If you are a big-hearted, socially aware person, you probably feel that life has taught you a lot during the last 18 months, too.

So this year, as I do every year around my birthday, I reflect on the critical lessons I learned during the twelve preceding months. It’s an understatement to say that this year the lessons were insightful and profound. Living amid a global pandemic, dealing with constant civil unrest, dealing with racial reckoning, and enduring an international quarantine encouraged me to reflect deeply about how I was living, loving, and leading.

So, during this week, I invite you to think about the critical lessons you learned in 2020, and what lessons you are learning today. I have provided a few prompts for you.

  • How did you learn to create more love, more peace, and more joy in your life amid the chaos?
  • What were the major lessons that you had to unlearn and relearn to reclaim harmony, restore relationships, and reimagine how you engage the world?
  • Where in your life are you marginalizing, minimizing, trivializing, and stigmatizing your own vision, your own goals, and your own desires?
  • Where in your life are you still tied to patterns and perspectives that are sabotaging your growth?
  • How can you better embrace your worthiness, commit to more self-care, and connect more profoundly with your loved ones?

The answers to these questions may require that you consciously reset your priorities, rethink your childhood, and create new environments so you can flourish and thrive. Your answers may even require you to take some risks and make new investments in yourself and others.

Even though a bit chaotic, this season offers enormous possibilities. And if you walk with courage, be resilient, and envision wholeness for yourself and others, you will launch into a new dimension of joy.

Wishing you well as you Dare To Soar HIGHER!

Blessings,

SharRon

*P.S. Sign up for my newsletter to get access to my private podcast. Click here.

If You Can’t Trust Yourself, Trust Your Track Record

As you start a new month, I have a hard question for you.

Have you ever wanted to go for a promotion or start a business but felt inadequate?

Have ever felt you were not qualified enough, did not have the right degree, and didn’t have the right connections to pursue your dreams?

I have. Early in my career, I would interview for job after job, but never land the promotions I desired and earned.

I grew really frustrated because I knew that the folks who landed the positions were not more skilled or educated than I was. Heck, I even trained some of them.

Of course, there were many factors working against me. I was a young, Black woman and the biopharmaceutical industry was not ready to embrace diversity, especially without a fight.

After being looked over and picked apart, I told my father that I was leaving corporate America. But I also admitted that I feared failing as an entrepreneur.

He said, “SharRon, if you can’t trust yourself, trust your track record.”

Whew.. that statement was the jolt I needed to help me remember all the successes that shaped my career. That one brief statement encouraged me to take a jog down memory lane and I realized I had shattered many glass ceilings, smashed a few paradigms, and kicked in numerous closets. Yes, I had a track record of success.

Why is it important to review your track record? 

As you pursue your purpose, you will be forced to take some risks. And when you do, it’s always helpful to have a few people to remind you of your mastery, abilities, and capacity to overcome obstacles. It’s also extremely wise to have a strong inner core, which I define as a group of people who can help you rise to the occasion and help you resist the spirit of fear. For me, my inner core included my father.

Over the weekend, take a close inventory of your friends and determine which friends have the traits and the mentality to be in your inner core. Use the MRS framework to help you identify which friends most align with your needs, dreams, and goals. And then make some needed adjustments so you can SOAR.

I have provided a quick overview of the MRS framework for you to review.

  • M = People with whom you enjoy Meaningful Mutuality
  • R = People who help you RISE, REST, RECOVER, and RESIST
  • S = People who are Spiritually aware, awakened, and live. 

We all need people who believe in us; our friendships are critical to our calling. That’s why, in “You Can Depend On You,” I dedicate an entire module to identifying and cultivating healthy connections. If you are going to become the highest version of yourself, gather and engage with people who can share their wisdom, time, and talent with you. Find a great core for your calling!

Remember, you can depend on yourself to foster relationships with helpful, faithful folks. Even if you made some poor selections in the past, as I did, you can still trust yourself to make positive “friend” choices today.

In my newest book, Deciding To Soar 2:Unwrapping Your Purpose, I dedicate 10 chapters on the topic of friendships. Be sure to order it today, and if you enjoy it, please leave a review. Click here to order.

Blessings!

 

SharRon

 

It’s Not A Badge Of Honor; It’s The Kiss Of Death!

Over the weekend, a group of women shared how a cultural assumption was gradually killing them.

Yes, KILLING them!

What’s the assumption:  All Black Women Must Live Up To The Strong Black Women trope. 

I know saying that a woman is strong is supposed to be a compliment. But, is it really?

When a Black woman is expected to deal with racism, sexism, poverty, being underpaid, being overworked, being unsupported, being devalued, being unprotected, and being vilified without rest, comfort, compensation, and care, is that fair?

No, it is not fair. In fact, trying to live up to that oppressive stereotype is a burden, an insult, and the kiss of death! It is a denial of our humanity and an assault on our dignity.

Since the stereotype is so harmful, what does that mean?

It means that YOU MUST let some things go!

If you want to reclaim your health and peace, you must detach from the narrative and all of the expectations that come with it.

Listen, I know it will be difficult. Over-extending and exhausting ourselves have both been ingrained into our psyche. Even as little girls, we were praised for neglecting, ignoring, and deprioritizing ourselves. We were elevated and adored if we worked as selfless martyrs.

But no more!

Sis, please take off the superwoman cape before it becomes a casket.

And, please give yourself permission to divest from this and other oppressive narratives that steal your peace, joy, and rest.

I want to say again for the people in the back: Being an SBW Is Not A Badge Of Honor; It’s The Kiss Of Death!

So, throughout the week, support yourself deeply.

Love yourself!

Say no!

Put yourself first!

Liberate yourself from people, places, and things that undermine you and drain your strength.

Promise yourself that you will find at least one hour every week to really nurture yourself.

Also, find a healthy group of women who can listen, love, and nourish you as you rethink your life in this post-COVID world.

The world is reopening and there will be many opportunities for you to leverage your gifts, talents, and wisdom to create a different life that aligns with who you are today.

But you can only benefit from the opportunities if you are not weary. As I share in my book, Deciding To Soar 2, it’s hard to win when you are weary.

Remember, you can depend on yourself to make choices that honor your soul. And most of all, after you make your value-based choices, there are wonderful people waiting to help you implement your choices so you can live a more wholesome, holistic life.

I am cheering for you!

You got this!

My team and I are here for you.

Blessings!

SharRon

Are You A Discount Diva? Are You Undervaluing Yourself?

Have you ever played yourself cheap or betrayed yourself to fit into a specific group?

I have.

In fact, 25 years ago, one of my dearest friends told me I devalued myself so much that I navigated in the world like a “discount diva.”

What? A discount diva?

Boy, I was crushed! I was not only offended by how casually she called me out, but I was also saddened because her words felt true. And because her words felt true to my soul, I felt embarrassed, stupid, and exposed.

At first, I rejected her perspective, and I was defensive. I tried to convince her that I was NOT that chick; I was not a discount diva. I did my best to persuade her that I was accomplished, educated, and polished because my fragile ego could not take such painful, though honest, comments.

It was an emotionally excruciating day, but I listened to my friend. While she shared her revelations, I cried, really sobbed, as she lovingly explained how she “experienced” me. She provided details, examples, and names. Her comments were thoughtful, candid, and courageous.

My conversation with my friend was life-changing, and I go into greater detail about that experience in Deciding To Soar 2. If you haven’t bought the book, please do. If you have purchased my newest book, please turn to Chapter 50. You will find the entire story there. Order here or via Amazon.

How did I process my friend’s candid feedback?

By using a method called the TRUTH Method.

The TRUTH Method is a process I created to ensure that I don’t immediately reject helpful feedback, and it is the same process that I use with powerful people today.

The TRUTH Method helps people objectively review and dissect the past WITHOUT shaming themselves because shame never changes behavior. And most of all, the TRUTH Method leads to value-based action and deep emotional healing.

TRUTH Method

  • T = Even though feedback is tough to hear, take it in. Listen with fresh ears.
  • R = Don’t immediately resist and reject feedback, reflect on it. Assess your behavior and beliefs. Identify what’s feels true.
  • U = Don’t shun feedback, “UN” it. (Un is a prefix that means to do the opposite.) You may need to unpack, unlearn, or untether yourself from old conditioning to heal.
  •  Trust yourself to make new decisions and to tackle the naysayers and your internal critics. Lovingly challenge and confront anything that prevents your growth.
  • H = Don’t hide from your mistakes or your beliefsGet help, huddle, and heal. 

Bottom-line is this: Acknowledging the truth is the basis of transformation. And to make dynamic, life-changing shifts in your life, you must identify and reckon with your past, your habits, your hobbies, your relationships, and your beliefs that strip you of power.

You MUST tell yourself the truth!

You can listen to more insights on our community private podcast feed by joining my newsletter. Click here to join.

You can also listen via YouTube by clicking here. And while you are there, please subscribe to my YouTube channel.

Moral of the story: Honor yourself and seek feedback. Learn how people “experience” you. Never forget that you are a divine design and not a discount diva. You have much to offer the world.

P.S. Make sure you purchase Deciding To Soar 2: Unwrapping Your Purpose and the Deciding To Soar Reflection Guide by clicking here.

Blessings!

SharRon