How To Deal With Haters In Your Home!
People who throw stones at you are simply in love with where you’re going. – Dr. Maya Angelou
Does this quote from the late Dr. Maya Angelou resonate with you?
When I first saw the quote, it made me think of a hater—someone who criticizes or tries to undermine one’s dreams, beliefs, reputation, or goals.
The quote resonated so much that I created a workshop entitled “How to Deal With Haters in Your Home.”
In the workshop, I defined “homes” broadly because we navigate and spend time in many types of homes. For example, we spend time and energy in our work homes, exercise homes, worship homes, political homes, educational homes, or other organizational homes.
But, wherever we spend our time, we will inevitably encounter people who will try to make our lives miserable. It’s unfortunate, but it’s the truth.
As I shared with the audience, SOARING HIGHER means rethinking how we view haters.
Why?
Throughout my life, my haters have been extremely instrumental in my growth and development. In some ways, they have been my refiners, motivators, and catalysts; they have been blessings in disguise!
The workshop was such a success that I shared some insights from the workshop in this week’s episode of Deciding To Soar: Living Life Your Own Way.
INSIGHTS
When your haters behave badly, remember that ….
1. You Are NOT Under Attack; You Are Under Construction.
Haters can highlight areas you need to improve, develop, or fortify. If you don’t have knee-jerk reactions to their insults, backstabbing, and “roadblocking,” haters can help you activate your innate talents, access your own wisdom, and build coalitions to help you achieve your goals. Haters can also apply just enough pressure to make you more decisive so that you move more urgently, consistently, and courageously.
The truth is, I have been incredibly hurt and betrayed by haters. But even when their tactics felt threatening or career-killing, I realized that all things—even those that make me cry and angry… were working together for my highest good. As my elders used to say, “What people thought would destroy me, really developed me.” And that’s why I know haters have always been a part of my refinement, creativity, and ascension process.
2. Haters Will Get On Your Nerves, But They Will Also Keep You On Your Knees. (praying)
Let’s be honest; haters can intimidate, irritate, and infuriate you, especially when they stoop to low levels to hurt you. However, haters can also help you be more discerning, which allows you to see and sense motives, sabotage, or other covert behavior.
When I think about my life, my haters have sensitized me to my own inner knowing, leading to many life-enhancing decisions. When their antics forced me to my knees (pray or spiritual practice), it made me more open to hearing God, refining my vision, clarifying my purpose, and strengthening my resolve to accomplish my goals. Through prayer, I was able to unleash my imagination to see new possibilities, create innovative solutions, and challenge old paradigms.
I know this for sure: Most haters forget that success—however you define it—is spiritual. And….. spirituality encourages all of us to connect with our own power, trust our intuition, and look to our Higher Power for direction and protection.
3. Haters Will Enlist Saboteurs, But Their Antics Will Reveal Your Real Supporters.
Believe it or not, mean-spirited haters will often help you attract new supporters. When people try to tear you down, sincere, principled, and open-minded people will come to your defense. People who understand who you are, what you are trying to accomplish, and what you are going through will become your strongest allies and provide additional resources, opportunities, and backing. They will partner with you and root for your rise.
When I think about my life, my haters have escorted me to tremendous success and more visibility. Even though their gossip campaigns, smear tactics, and other sabotaging strategies were designed to destroy me, their mean-spirited antics have ushered me into new communities and partnerships that have warmed my heart and expanded my reach. So, instead of feeling betrayed and belittled, I have been blessed and bolstered in ways that have elevated my mission, restored my faith, and strengthened my heart.
My ancestors said it best: Messy and mean folks are good magnets for good messengers and positive missions.
Family, it’s true. Haters can be manipulative, pathological, polarizing, tricky, unethical, stubborn, biased, and reckless.
Yet, your haters can result in your biggest hallelujah.
So, remember, you are a force to be reckoned with.
You are a person with goals, dreams, and a divine calling.
You are the captain of your own destiny.
Believe in yourself, and don’t let anyone dim your lights or make you doubt your destiny.
Let your haters be your motivators because the best – YOUR BEST – is yet to come.
Blessings to you,
SharRon
***If you know someone dealing with a hater, will you share this message with them?
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