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Author: SharRon Jamison

What Can Your “Little” You Tell You About Your “Adult” Needs?

Can you believe that this is the last Sunday of 2020?

So much happened in 2020, I almost lost track of time.

As the year ends, I have one last question: Do you ever look at your childhood pictures?

A few years ago, I saw a picture of me when I was 7. I looked deeply at the picture and it made me wonder…

  • What did this little girl want?
  • How did this little girl have fun?
  • What did this little girl believe about her potential and purpose?
  • What did this little girl hope for her life?
  • When did this little girl stop dreaming big?
  • What made this little girl feel loved, seen, and heard?
  • What did this little girl endure?

I still don’t know all the answers,  but this morning I am asking myself those questions again because my little girl has wisdom that the adult me needs.

The adult ME needs to look beyond my conditioning – both bad and good- to see what the little girl wanted and needed so that I CAN give it to her.

What did your little girl or little boy need?

How can you give it to them in 2021 so you can experience joy, fulfillment, and peace?

On this last Sunday of 2020, I hope you have time to reflect on your life so you can make 2021 a year that most aligns with who you are, what you desire, and what you feel called to do.

I hope you have a moment to reflect on how difficult, daunting, and divisive 2020 was and make plans for more ease, deeper connections, and more consistent self-care in 2021.

And, if you want to go on a reflective and transformative journey with me and other like-minded people, you can also join the Deciding to Soar Bookclub. Together we can look deeply at our lives and delve into our hearts to make the right choices, not just the easy choices.

Most of all, you don’t have to go on the journey alone!

I have provided information on a few of the topics we will address in the book club. Click here to join.

Happy Kwanza (if you celebrate)!

I wish you a blessed, abundant New Year!

Thank you so much for letting me share my thoughts with you during 2020.

Blessings, and let’s continue to Soar Higher in 2021!

SharRon

I Reckon

I reckon.

I reckon is a phrase that my elders used a lot. It was a phrase that did not mean “yes” or “no.”

When someone said I “reckon,” it meant that they were thinking. Questioning. Considering. Pondering. Reflecting.

During these last two weeks of December, maybe it’s time for us to reckon, too.

Maybe it’s time for us to reckon and consider what we believe about our jobs, what we believe about our marriages, what we believe about our abilities, what we believe about our purpose, and what we believe about ourselves.

Maybe it’s time for us to reckon so we can create a world that’s more equitable, more peaceful, more loving, and more humane.

The truth is, COVID-19 has changed all of our lives. Now it is time to pull back the curtain and really identify what we learned and what we want to do differently in the years to come.

As you reckoning, take a few minutes to listen to this message. These 7 questions will help you with your reckoning process so you can make 2021 a powerful year.

Also, don’t forget to purchase Deciding To Soar 2. The book is filled with wisdom to help you refine your goals and activate your courage. Click here.

Happy New Year!

 

What Are You Building With?

No matter what you are building, you are always building something.

But here’s the question: What are you using to build?

If you build your home with rotten, 2nd-hand, flimsy wood, it won’t be able to withstand storms or withstand significant weight. It won’t have the capacity or durability.

The same is true for building your life. You can’t build a productive, fulfilling life based on toxicity and trauma. Trust me, I tried that for 2 decades.

The most important gift you can give yourself is the gift of healing.

The second most important gift is the gift of your self-development.

When you invest in expanding your mind, you introduce yourself to a bigger, brighter, and bolder world. You stretch your imagination. Your increase your proficiency and your competency. And consequently, you multiply your opportunities to SOAR!

Starting in a few weeks, a few high-performing women and I are starting a journey BACK to who we originally were before the world imposed their beliefs on us.

We are going to reclaim our desires, resurrect our dreams, and replenish our souls. We are going to build what we desire MOST! We are making ourselves the priority!

If you are ready to build a life free of ideologies, behaviors, and habits that have already stolen enough of your time, joy, and peace, join me for “I Dare To Be Me”. Click here to learn more.

It’s time to build your life based on what makes your heart sing.

It’s Time For YOU To Conduct A “Friend” Inventory!

If you have heard me speak this year, you have probably heard me say that everything is created, cared for, and cultivated on “ships.” EVERYTHING!

Yes, our “ships” influence and affect our lives. It does not matter if it is a partnership, fellowship, companionship, mentorship, sponsorship, relationship, distributorship, friendship, citizenship, “situationship”, and the list goes on…our lives are touched and shaped by others. Even when we are not aware of it, we are somehow informed, energized, challenged, or repulsed by the words and ways of others.   Everybody leaves an impression, good or bad,  in our lives.

Because our connections are critical, it is vital that we analyze who we spend time with, who we seek wisdom from, and who we allow in our intimate space. And as we elevate our lives or shift our priorities, we may need to adjust and re-adjust where and with whom we spend our time and share our energy.

Let’s be honest. That’s hard for some of us. Evaluating or repositioning our relationships brings up all types of emotional baggage, feelings of abandonment, and childhood triggers. That’s why we sometimes stay tethered to connections that are toxic, abusive, and lifeless.

Here is something to consider: Making adjustments or analyzing your relationships does NOT mean that you don’t love or like people.

Adjusting and evaluating your relationships mean that are you committed to your OWN growth, self-care, and elevation. It means that you are being intentional about your time because you NEED new experiences, different information, and increased exposure to opportunities, so you can plan, position, and prepare yourself for what’s NEXT in your life. Scrutinizing your connections means that you are cognizant that you have limited time and only so much energy and that everyone you connect with must be beneficial and fruitful to your life.  Essentially, ensuring that you are surrounded and supported by a healthy network is an act of SELF LOVE!

Here is the bottom line: Growth does NOT happen in isolation, in stagnation, or in the wrong congregation. Growth happens in stimulating and safe environments that are replete with rich diversity, great dialogue, and vigorous debate.

That’s why we NEED conversations that challenge our thinking. We need to attend events that expand our minds, touch our souls, and frame our dreams. We need to be pushed, pulled, and poured into in ways that increase our competence, capacity, and our curiosity. We need connections that hold us responsible and accountable for HIGH standards.

We need to SEE and EXPERIENCE MORE because our lives develop or diminish based on what we know, what we think, what we do, and what we are exposed to.

What’s the take-home message? We can’t SOAR if we don’t know MORE!

That approach sounds simple but learning and doing MORE demand that we develop relationships for where we are going, not where we are now.

As you enter the 4th Quarter of 2020, and before you make another resolution, take inventory of your connections.  Find a quiet place and start with 3 simple questions.

  1. How is this connection helping me SEE me better, differently, or fuller?
  2. How is this connection supporting me now, who I am becoming, and my vision for the future?
  3. How is this connection strengthening, stretching, or shifting me?

Our relationships are our greatest resources. So, pay attention. Choose relationships that grow you up, grow you out, and grow you within. That way you can be better equipped to SOAR Higher.

Let me hear from you. Please leave a message below.

Let’s Dare To Soar Higher!

SharRon

You Don’t Have To Live A “Shouldy” Life!

Racism, Religion, and Rules

Ask anyone who has ever achieved any success and they will tell you that the 3 things that they had to confront and conquer were issues related to racism, religion, and societal rules.

Why? Because all 3 are based on “shoulds” and prevent you from being who you were created to be.

Racism, religion, and societal rules attempt to limit your choices, make you second-guess your inner wisdom, and cause you to undermine your worth.

How do I know? I let a few “shoulds” shrink my life. And when I finally had the courage to do what I wanted to do, the “shoulds” tried to shame and stifle me. But guess what? I did what I wanted to do.

I married who I wanted to marry and lost tons of friends and my family. I challenged racist policies in corporate America and lost a few promotions. I stopped climbing the corporate ladder to pursue the ministry and people called me crazy. And when I endorsed marriage equality, I lost a few preaching engagements!

I honored my heart, and I did what was right for me; I didn’t follow the “shoulds”. I reclaimed and restructured my life so I could do meaningful work in the corporate space, pursue my calling in the ministry, write books to challenge social paradigms, and start heart-centered businesses to support other women.

I finally started getting out of my head worrying about what other people thought and into my heart so that I could trust myself. I DID Me…mistakes and all!

You can “DO” you, too. You don’t have to live a “shouldy” life. You can be FREE to do what you want to do!

After coaching and mentoring many high-performing women, what I know for sure is that too many women are miserable because they feel trapped by “shoulds”! They are staying in jobs, in churches, in relationships, and in lifestyles that are stealing their peace. They are doing what everybody else wants them to do and not what they want or feel called to do.

If you don’t believe me, ask a few of your friends if they are happy or fulfilled. And then ask them why. I bet their responses will have something to do with race, religion, or societal rules.

If you are ready to ditch the “shoulds” so you can live honestly and openly, I want to invite you to Unshackled: Desires, Dreams, and Destiny.

In an intimate setting with other high-performing women,  we will examine the origins of “shoulds” and identify how “shoulds’ are stealing your joy and shrinking your life.

This is what I know for sure: “shoulds” make you settle, struggle, and suffer. But when you do what you want to do, you can radically transform your life and create a life that makes your heart sing!

 Unshackled: Desires, Dreams, and Destiny will cover 4 Key Areas.

  • How to have better “I” Sight so you can see who you are unencumbered by “shoulds”. You are more amazing than you realize, and when you see yourself through the lens of potential and possibility, you will create a life that most reflects who you are and who you are becoming.
  • How to have greater illumination so you can better identify ways to increase your capacity to enjoy your desires, pursue your dreams, and fulfill your destiny. Trust me. Identifying your unconscious beliefs, dismantling old paradigms, and shedding old programming will help you unleash your gifts, ignite your passion, and bring peace to your soul.
  • How to discern what types of interactions support you. You will have an opportunity to talk about friendship. Let’s face it. We all need people in our lives to support and love us; none of us thrives well in isolation. But choosing people who provide a safe place for you to grow and explore your full personality, allows you to celebrate your worth and honor your individuality.
  • How to implement what you learn so that you can increase your ability to live a bolder, fuller, and more honest life. In the safety of a small, intimate group, you can share without judgment, and without apology knowing that women can hold space for your authenticity and truth.  And in that knowing, you will have an opportunity to address whatever is holding your back from full self-expression and massive joy.

If you are ready to love who you want to love, do what you want to do, and believe what you want to believe, join me. 

You don’t have to live a “shouldy” life.

We are starting in a few weeks! There are only 15 spots.

DM or send me a message at SharRon@SharRonJamison.com for more information or you can register below.

Click here to register.

You May Get Weary In Well-Doing So Take A Break!

I am checking on you.

Please forgive my delay. It took a moment to collect my thoughts.  I had to pray and reflect on what I wanted to say and how I wanted to say it.

Honestly, I can NOT express everything that I am feeling in this one email. Like you, my heart is heavy.

 My heart is full of many emotions. I feel grief, anger, sadness, resentment, rage, disappointment, exhausted, and hopelessness. I feel passion, commitment, and energized. I feel many emotions, some even conflict with others. 

You may also have complex, contradictory emotions. Nobody has a script on how to manage and endure injustice. 

So what do you do?

Here is my prayer for you.  Do you! Do whatever you feel is right for YOU! You don’t need validation, authorization, or authentication to feel your feelings, or to do what you need to do FOR YOU!

 You can cry and cuss! You can vent and pray. You can protest or volunteer. You can donate money, time, or expertise. You can rest and re-set.  You can strategize and build. DO YOU!

 What we are facing is hard stuff. Not one of us will manage or experience this situation the same.

 For me, as an African American woman and as a mom, the fight is exhausting, gut-wrenching, and stress-inducing.  And I know that the fight will NOT end soon.

 Why?

 Nobody gives up power, profits, and privilege easily.  Only consistent pressure and persistent pain–political and financial –will affect change. And trust me. The pressure to do what is right and fair will be met with all forms of resistance; history proves that so be prepared.

 So, during this lengthy battle against this systemic, sadistic, damnable disease called racism, you will need to rest and reengage many times. So, please take care of yourself.

 When you are ready and rested, take part in the revolution in a way that works for you — your skills, your abilities, and your sanity. Don’t guilt yourself or shame yourself. 

 Remember,  ONLY you KNOW what’s best for you!

 I made a brief video to support you. Click here. It’s less than 5 min. long.

 Please know that I am here for you and with you.

 I am fighting right by your side and with all of our allies–irrespective of their color, age, ability, gender, sexual orientation, faith traditions, or color.

 If people are committed to liberty and justice for ALL, I am on board. I am ready to sit and dine at the table of mutuality, respect, and honor.

 If people are unwilling to be fair, respectful, and equitable, I am ready to be on the battlefield for justice for as long as it takes. 

 Let’s be honest. This fight for equality and justice won’t be over soon, but it will be won.   It will be won through blood, tears, defiance, volunteerism, contributions, protests, honesty, policies, forgiveness, and more.

 Until then, fight, rest, and re-engage in your own way until freedom rings.  We got this!

 Let’s Dare To Soar Higher TOGETHER!

 Blessing to you,

 SharRon

Women, It Is Up To Us!

Feminine power is one of the most amazing things to witness. Seeing women who are brilliant, beautiful, and brave and able to stand fully in their brilliance is a testament to our collective strength (our amazingness).

But when we women continue to use men as role models of leadership, we dilute our own power and diminish our strength. We minimize the characteristics and traits that make women different and great.

Women are connectors. When we are walking in our femininity, we have the power to use empathy, vulnerability, and/or inclusion as a competitive edge. We are able to negotiate sensitive contracts that leave people with their dignity and their willingness to continue to collaborate not only with their heads but with their hearts.

Women, we don’t need to operate in a stereotypical male-accepted paradigm to be effective, productive, or acknowledged. Women, we need to be what we were created to be…POWERFUL, PURPOSEFUL, and Proficient in our unique way!

If you are a leader, and all women are, it is up to us to model a different way. It is up to us to show our daughters, granddaughters, and sisters that leadership does not have to be wrapped up in a male form to succeed. We don’t need to mimic men! We can be women and celebrate all the variations of femininity….because femininity is diverse and divine.

Women, we MUST model “difference”. If not, those behind us will mimic the same actions and interactions that have created corruption, oppression, and excessive greed. We can make a difference; we are DIFFERENCE MAKERS!

Women, it is up to us and we can DO IT!

Let’s Dare to Soar Higher!

**Women, “You Can Depend On You” begins on June 1st. You don’t want to miss this amazing opportunity to create the life that you desire and desire.

Click here to learn more.

Feminine power is one of the most amazing things to witness. Seeing women who are brilliant, beautiful, and brave and able to stand fully in their brilliance is a testament to our collective strength (our amazingness).

 

But when we women continue to use men as role models of leadership, we dilute our own power and diminish our strength. We minimize the characteristics and traits that make women different and great.

 

Women are connectors. When we are walking in our femininity, we have the power to use empathy, vulnerability, and/or inclusion as a competitive edge. We are able to negotiate sensitive contracts that leave people with their dignity and their willingness to continue to collaborate not only with their heads but with their hearts.

 

Women, we don’t need to operate in a stereotypical male-accepted paradigm to be effective, productive, or acknowledged. Women, we need to be what we were created to be…POWERFUL, PURPOSEFUL, and Proficient in our unique way!

 

If you are a leader, and all women are, it is up to us to model a different way. It is up to us to show our daughters, granddaughters, and sisters that leadership does not have to be wrapped up in a male form to succeed. We don’t need to mimic men! We can be women and celebrate all the variations of femininity….because femininity is diverse and divine.

 

Women, we MUST model “difference”. If not, those behind us will mimic the same actions and interactions that have created corruption, oppression, and excessive greed. We can make a difference; we are DIFFERENCE MAKERS!

 

Women, it is up to us and we can DO IT!

 

Let’s Dare to Soar Higher!

 

**Women, “You Can Depend On You” begins on June 1st.  You don’t want to miss this amazing opportunity to create the life that you desire and desire.

Click here to learn more.

Your Story Matters, Especially Now!

Am I the only one who has ever failed? Of course not! 

We all fail!

But….

Most people don’t want to share their fiascos, failures or flops. Most don’t want to share where and how they stumbled, stopped or self-sabotaged. Most want to hide their mistakes. They want to shine and give the impression that success, transformation, and growth were easy and stress-free.

But that’s not the truth. In fact, life is a collection of good and bad experiences.  And when we KNOW that life includes both the good and the bad, we cope better. We don’t get sidelined by adversity or discouraged by challenges.

That’s why I believe it is important to share the truth about our wins AND wounds. If you really want to help people stay encouraged, they need to know the reality of success and elevation. People need the truth, not curated highlight reels that promise instant fame and fortune.

That’s why I believe that sharing our stars and our scars is key. People need to see that we have blessings and burdens, triumphs and tragedies, guts and goofs, successes and sorrows, highs and lows, fear and faith, and friends and foes.  People need, want and are helped by seeing and knowing it ALL, not just the part we want them to see.

I have learned that letting people see my struggles, sacrifices and sometimes my sadness lets me connect with people in ways that transform, inform and reform me and them. Sharing it ALL helps and heals me, and it helps others who can testify and relate that my experience is their experience too.  Sharing connects and corrects.

So, when tempted to hide your failures – and nothing is a failure – what will you do?

Here are a few questions to consider:

As we all are re-building, reimagining, and re-prioritizing our lives, how are you sharing your wisdom?

How are you sharing your failures without judging yourself?

How are you providing insight so that others can avoid the same pitfalls?

How are you allowing others to see the REAL journey so they can learn?

How are you sharing your losses and the lessons so that to propel others forward?

How are you sharing your stories to support others?

What I have learned…our stories may be the stories that save lives. It may just be the story people need to heal and to stay encouraged as they journey through life. (from the upcoming book, I Have Learned A Few More Things).

If you want to get on the mailing list to learn more about my next book release, please click here.

Let’s Dare to Soar Higher Together!

Blessings!

SharRon

Being Cute Is Not Enough!

Being pretty does not always mean that you are attractive. Attractive means that you are a magnet for change, growth and abundance.

Are you attractive?

 

I know you look good but are you a magnet for other leaders, trailblazers, and visionaries?

 

As a high-performer yourself, you need other people around you who are just as talented, skilled, and gifted as you are. You need people who are confident and are willing to share, support, and help you upgrade your skills.

 

And guess what?

 

They need you too! 

 

In other words, you need to be equally yoked!

 

Trust me, being equally yoked is not only for marriage and partnerships. Being equally yoked is essential if you want to grow, evolve, and SOAR to new levels in your life.

 

So how do you attract people who are just as driven, giving, and authentic as you are?

 

I share a few tips in the video below. But if you don’t have 6 minutes,

Here are a few tips:

 

  • List three adjectives that you feel describe you today
  • List 3 adjectives that you aspire to in the next five years
  • Ask three people to share 3 adjectives about you
  • Ask three people how they “experience” you so that you can identify your social blindspots and/or your social/relational strengths
  • Ask three people to identify the 3 top values that govern your life based on their interaction with you 

 

Now, be open to the feedback and ask for suggestions or explanations if you need clarity.

 

It might be a bit uncomfortable, but understanding how you are perceived is essential to attracting people who have the character and competence you need to SOAR Higher!

 

Bottom line: As 2019 comes to a close, it’s time to reflect and reexamine how you show up in the world.

 

Why? 2020 is the decade of destiny and you must attract the caliber of connections and resources that you need to excel at life and love.

 

I look forward to sharing more about the importance of connections and success in the next “Dare To Me” cohort. Click here for more information.

 

It starts in late February, so get on the waitlist today to receive exclusive bonuses and gifts.

 

Blessings and Happy New Year!

 

P.S. I would love to work with you. In the meantime,… here are a few ways I can help you transform your life from the inside out:

 

1. Subscribe to my Youtube channel and feed your mind and soul about relationships, success, and “doing” YOU!. Click here to start listening. I will follow you back.

2. FOLLOW me on Instagram to fill your IG feed with bit-sized motivation to help you through the day. Click here to follow me and I will follow you back.

3. Download my Free Audio Series on Friendship. 

 

 

From Bad Break-up to Good Wake-up

Bad Breakups…. Yuck!!

If you have ever experienced a bad personal, professional or a career break-up, you know that bad breakups are not easy. Feelings fly, accusations assault, lies label, connections collapse, and remarks ruin reputations. Severing relationships can be dicey, destructive and detrimental.

If the parties are not emotionally mature and spiritually-grounded, they expose themselves and others to undue scrutiny. They share intimate details of the break-up to make themselves right and to show the entire world that the other person is wrong. Trust is violated, secrets are disclosed, businesses are lost and what was shared in confidence gets plastered on social media. Making personal, business and intimate disclosures, of course, is not high-level emotional functioning, but we all have done it.

 Let’s face it…. when people are hurting, they lash out and some people play dirty. They tell half-truths, concoct outright lies, or share sensitive information that compromises not only their lives but also the lives of others. The full truth is rarely shared, and, when we are blinded by our pain, nobody really remembers the full truth anyway. After coaching people for over 20 years there are a few things I know for sure: pain has a way of making people pretty, pain causes amnesia and pain degrades others.

What I also know for sure is that pain or scandal is a magnet for messy people. Messy people run to scandal faster than pigs flock to slop. Messy people are like vultures who circle around wounded people waiting to stir the pot of pain so that they can to add their own special brand of venom to an already volatile situation. Of course, that makes the pain worse.

But breakups, though painful, are not the times to numb your feelings by finding another date or another bestie to fill the void. Yes, you need friends; we all need support. But we also need to feel our feelings too because breaks-up are the times for deep reflection and honest introspection.

What I know for sure is that breakups are great times for emotional check-ups and spiritual wake-ups. Post break-ups are times to get quiet and journal. It’s a great time to ask yourself some key questions to understand why the relationship started, why the relationship failed, what parts of you need healing or development and what you really desire in your “ships”.

The more you learn about you, the more information you have to support your new relationship with yourself AND to support a connection with a prospective partner.  Knowledge is power and self-awareness are key to growth, fulfillment, and satisfaction.

But above all, remember that any information you gained from relationships, should stay between the parties involved. The relationship was not a community event; it was once a special bond or agreement between the two of you.

If you are going through a break-up or if you want to learn more skills to prevent another break-up, register for the You Can Depend on You Coaching Program starting on September 21. This is the last time in 2017 that this program will be offered as a live on-line program.

If you have questions and if you are tired of choosing people who don’t align with your values, register today. https://tinyurl.com/YouCanDependonYou

Let’s dare to soar higher as we honor the sanctity of connections even after the connection is over.

***If you need some communication advice to prevent future break-ups, be sure to get my free gift here. http://daretosoarhigher.sharronjamison.com/

Blessings!

SharRon, Your Life Strategist