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Tag: strong black woman

If You Can’t Trust Yourself, Trust Your Track Record

As you start a new month, I have a hard question for you.

Have you ever wanted to go for a promotion or start a business but felt inadequate?

Have ever felt you were not qualified enough, did not have the right degree, and didn’t have the right connections to pursue your dreams?

I have. Early in my career, I would interview for job after job, but never land the promotions I desired and earned.

I grew really frustrated because I knew that the folks who landed the positions were not more skilled or educated than I was. Heck, I even trained some of them.

Of course, there were many factors working against me. I was a young, Black woman and the biopharmaceutical industry was not ready to embrace diversity, especially without a fight.

After being looked over and picked apart, I told my father that I was leaving corporate America. But I also admitted that I feared failing as an entrepreneur.

He said, “SharRon, if you can’t trust yourself, trust your track record.”

Whew.. that statement was the jolt I needed to help me remember all the successes that shaped my career. That one brief statement encouraged me to take a jog down memory lane and I realized I had shattered many glass ceilings, smashed a few paradigms, and kicked in numerous closets. Yes, I had a track record of success.

Why is it important to review your track record? 

As you pursue your purpose, you will be forced to take some risks. And when you do, it’s always helpful to have a few people to remind you of your mastery, abilities, and capacity to overcome obstacles. It’s also extremely wise to have a strong inner core, which I define as a group of people who can help you rise to the occasion and help you resist the spirit of fear. For me, my inner core included my father.

Over the weekend, take a close inventory of your friends and determine which friends have the traits and the mentality to be in your inner core. Use the MRS framework to help you identify which friends most align with your needs, dreams, and goals. And then make some needed adjustments so you can SOAR.

I have provided a quick overview of the MRS framework for you to review.

  • M = People with whom you enjoy Meaningful Mutuality
  • R = People who help you RISE, REST, RECOVER, and RESIST
  • S = People who are Spiritually aware, awakened, and live. 

We all need people who believe in us; our friendships are critical to our calling. That’s why, in “You Can Depend On You,” I dedicate an entire module to identifying and cultivating healthy connections. If you are going to become the highest version of yourself, gather and engage with people who can share their wisdom, time, and talent with you. Find a great core for your calling!

Remember, you can depend on yourself to foster relationships with helpful, faithful folks. Even if you made some poor selections in the past, as I did, you can still trust yourself to make positive “friend” choices today.

In my newest book, Deciding To Soar 2:Unwrapping Your Purpose, I dedicate 10 chapters on the topic of friendships. Be sure to order it today, and if you enjoy it, please leave a review. Click here to order.

Blessings!

 

SharRon

 

It’s Not A Badge Of Honor; It’s The Kiss Of Death!

Over the weekend, a group of women shared how a cultural assumption was gradually killing them.

Yes, KILLING them!

What’s the assumption:  All Black Women Must Live Up To The Strong Black Women trope. 

I know saying that a woman is strong is supposed to be a compliment. But, is it really?

When a Black woman is expected to deal with racism, sexism, poverty, being underpaid, being overworked, being unsupported, being devalued, being unprotected, and being vilified without rest, comfort, compensation, and care, is that fair?

No, it is not fair. In fact, trying to live up to that oppressive stereotype is a burden, an insult, and the kiss of death! It is a denial of our humanity and an assault on our dignity.

Since the stereotype is so harmful, what does that mean?

It means that YOU MUST let some things go!

If you want to reclaim your health and peace, you must detach from the narrative and all of the expectations that come with it.

Listen, I know it will be difficult. Over-extending and exhausting ourselves have both been ingrained into our psyche. Even as little girls, we were praised for neglecting, ignoring, and deprioritizing ourselves. We were elevated and adored if we worked as selfless martyrs.

But no more!

Sis, please take off the superwoman cape before it becomes a casket.

And, please give yourself permission to divest from this and other oppressive narratives that steal your peace, joy, and rest.

I want to say again for the people in the back: Being an SBW Is Not A Badge Of Honor; It’s The Kiss Of Death!

So, throughout the week, support yourself deeply.

Love yourself!

Say no!

Put yourself first!

Liberate yourself from people, places, and things that undermine you and drain your strength.

Promise yourself that you will find at least one hour every week to really nurture yourself.

Also, find a healthy group of women who can listen, love, and nourish you as you rethink your life in this post-COVID world.

The world is reopening and there will be many opportunities for you to leverage your gifts, talents, and wisdom to create a different life that aligns with who you are today.

But you can only benefit from the opportunities if you are not weary. As I share in my book, Deciding To Soar 2, it’s hard to win when you are weary.

Remember, you can depend on yourself to make choices that honor your soul. And most of all, after you make your value-based choices, there are wonderful people waiting to help you implement your choices so you can live a more wholesome, holistic life.

I am cheering for you!

You got this!

My team and I are here for you.

Blessings!

SharRon